Be careful what you pick up…

posted on 21 Aug 2008 in Engrish from Other Countries

No really honey, I picked it up at the store…

Photo courtesy of Christopher Lees.
Found in a Riyadh Supermarket.

151 captions

  1. coffeebot | 6:39 pm |

    …but the recipe calls for gonorrhea

  2. coffeebot | 6:40 pm |

    and you thought the toilet seat was risky

  3. Dangevin | 12:00 am |

    I just picked up a fresh case!

  4. James Dylan | 8:48 am |

    Excuse me, but where can I find the genital warts?

  5. BeadyEl | 10:27 am |

    And only 95 cents! At the brothel they wanted a hundred bucks….

  6. ArkhamAsylum | 1:25 am |

    always wear protection, i mean always.

  7. B Question | 5:45 am |

    Freshly picked!

  8. babblingqu | 7:34 am |

    Just like grandma used to make!

  9. Nyna | 7:57 pm |

    Well at least they are fresh….

  10. Bhakti | 9:06 pm |

    “Honey, I’ll pick up a bushel of the Fresh Herpes—you go get the bottle of ‘DISINFECTED’.” (See previous Engrish photo!)

  11. Pete | 3:14 pm |

    …and you know that fresh is best!!!

  12. Jason | 1:23 am |

    you can get the clap in asile 6. it’s next to the bread.

  13. Brandon | 4:49 am |

    You’ll eat them so fast, you’ll have herpes all over your face!

  14. Ghost08 | 8:06 am |

    I much prefer the sun-dried herpes-they prove to be more …gummy.

  15. adr | 2:49 pm |

    then you can get crabs at the seafood department

  16. Bob Waters | 8:49 am |

    Cold sores in the dairy case

  17. sycareus | 1:56 am |

    as opposed to freeze dried? i believe fresh is more fun

  18. CM | 12:18 pm |

    Zithromax- ISLE 4

  19. Liz | 6:20 pm |

    Would you like some syphilis with those herpes?

  20. Christopher Arbizu | 4:32 pm |

    For the virgin who just can’t get some.

  21. Christopher Arbizu | 4:33 pm |

    For the guy who can’t get it the hard way…

  22. MidoriSkyJT | 7:41 pm |

    Oh perfect! Now we can have salad AND a dessert.

  23. lillylivers | 1:04 pm |

    hmm….no wonder it was so cheap……

  24. Zoe | 1:09 pm |

    Husband to wife, I passed those herpes you brought home to you sister
    She asked if we could get anymore as the member of the PA at her daughters school had it too and wouls like to pass it on to there friends lmao.

  25. Kate | 2:48 pm |

    Wow, that woman on the corner wanted TWICE that price for some month old herpes!

  26. Pokejedservo | 8:27 pm |

    What is this world coming to where you can get an STD for practically pocket change? I tell you its so depressing…

  27. James | 5:17 pm |

    Grown with love.

  28. nick | 5:37 am |

    Reminds me of that joke-
    Whats green and eats nuts?
    Herpes

  29. Cat | 7:59 am |

    “Mommy, what’s herpes? Can I have some?”

    “No son, not till you’re older”…

  30. Anon | 2:45 pm |

    Yeah, it isn’t exactly flying off the shelves….

  31. patcap365 | 11:29 am |

    What a ripoff, it was cheaper in vegas

  32. Miss Echo | 6:38 pm |

    canned herpes are on aisle 5

  33. Lynn | 9:30 pm |

    After that, I’m going to the seafood department for crabs!

  34. SNOOKIE | 4:44 am |

    you could substitute dried instead, but fresh is always better

  35. arem | 9:52 pm |

    c’mon! who would buy herpes?! 2bucks per bucket!!!

  36. Wes | 9:01 pm |

    employee: sorry sir we won’t have any herpes for a while, it takes about 10 months to 10 years for them to show up.
    customer: dangit! looks like I’ll have to do this the old fasioned way.

  37. Trinity | 5:36 am |

    Dangit, they’re all sold out now!

  38. Nightturkey | 5:34 pm |

    Hey, it’s cheaper than the anti-lust spray

  39. Lollerss | 2:04 pm |

    I wonder who grew it…

  40. Angela | 6:31 pm |

    WHAT?? HERPES ON SALE FOR $.95??!?!?!?!

  41. Salman | 6:46 am |

    I’m Saudi and I live in Riyadh. I’ve never seen this supermarket before in my life. I’ve lived here for all my life. You sure this was Riyadh? Doesn’t look like it. It would be in Arabic if it was.

  42. Andrew Eia | 6:59 pm |

    I suppose we could get them just to try. Man I hope I can return them if they aren’t good.

  43. Peter | 11:14 pm |

    Oh goody!! Goes perfect with the salmonella steak I picked up at the butcher.

  44. Kevin Is Azn | 6:39 pm |

    Why get it from your sister when i can get it so cheap here?

  45. xploded_tb | 3:06 am |

    I didn’t know herpes came cheap! xD

  46. Eli | 10:26 am |

    …and don’t miss our special sale on vaginismus!

  47. Comer | 2:40 am |

    ” Flare up on Isle 4, Flare up on Isle 4. ”

    ;o)

  48. Brice Dudley | 12:15 pm |

    Ok, we’ve found the fresh herpes….all we need now is the dehydrated vaginal warts.

  49. Julia | 12:48 pm |

    “Honey I had to get the herpes. The Spring Onion wasn’t on sale”

  50. Ell | 10:30 pm |

    great for anybody who wants to get sick. just serve it for dinner and after 24 hours you’ll be having lesions showing up on yourself in no time!

  51. Heather | 10:18 pm |

    Vegetables so infectious… your kids’ll be begging for more!

  52. F | 5:37 pm |

    They should pair those herpes with a stand-up display of Abreva….

  53. ashley | 6:23 pm |

    because fraish AIDS just won’t cut it

  54. Addmin | 3:35 pm |

    How much “Fresh Herpies” can i get for a dollar?

  55. Simon des Baux | 1:36 am |

    And I thought it was onions that made you cry

  56. OR! … You could just lick the coins for free!

  57. Spazzy | 12:27 pm |

    I just love the lumps they leave on your tounge and that wholesome itchy taste

  58. sybil wee | 3:11 pm |

    just what i always wanted in my salad

  59. cheesepickle | 7:15 pm |

    Get your herpes! Fresh herpes! Only 0.95! Come on, sir, you look like you could use some herpes! Only ninety-five cents!

  60. Sam | 10:46 am |

    95 cents? You can get fresh herpes from that hooker on the corner for free.

  61. Dr. D | 12:43 pm |

    Dude, herpes cost me much more than that. After dinner, movie, broken condom, followed by doctor’s appt then ointment . . . I’ve got hundreds invested in mine. And what worse, I can’t even use mine in a recipe.

  62. Belbe | 10:23 am |

    I bet they’re not as fresh as the sign says!

  63. Matthew | 5:37 pm |

    But they were on discount!

  64. yaka mashineh | 11:17 pm |

    If you want to grow your own fresh herpes year-round, the Chia Mini-countertop Herpes Gardens are back by the nursery.

    Always a nice touch to add fresh herpes to your favorite home cooked meals for that extra special occasion.

  65. James | 12:57 pm |

    careful of those saladly transmitted diseases

  66. Robert Sumner | 1:08 pm |

    $0.95 a pound?!? I can get it free form a hooker!!

  67. Jamie Brannon | 7:44 pm |

    For your ex…

  68. a man who talk much | 10:09 pm |

    buy seed, make herpes garden!
    for friend!
    for joy!
    for happy!

  69. Jacob | 9:18 pm |

    Darn these cheap Wal-mart veggies!

  70. lacy | 3:41 pm |

    served with a side of chlamidiya

  71. Ree | 2:59 am |

    Want to skip school? Despise somebody? go shopping or send them! Low, very low, stinky and despicable diseases guaranteed ;D

  72. Blu | 6:58 pm |

    Special of the day- Bird Flu!

  73. Puki | 11:42 pm |

    at 95 cents per pound it’s a steal

  74. Purplehound | 1:50 pm |

    I can hear the commercial jingle in my head; “Ho, ho, ho… Green Giant!”

  75. TJ | 6:16 pm |

    Great! Now I can avoid a messy breakup with my girlfriend!

  76. Alaina | 8:15 pm |

    Then check out the crabs in the seafood department.

  77. daniel | 11:55 pm |

    fresh and cheap yay i want buy plz

  78. jer0me | 12:36 am |

    n0 sexual interc0urse necessary..

  79. hi | 11:44 pm |

    I’ll have herpes with a side of ebola

  80. Jrene | 7:25 pm |

    I remember when herpes was only $0.25 lbs.

  81. a kittah | 9:57 pm |

    pfft AIDs are 50 cents cheaper down the aisle

  82. estrelika | 3:46 pm |

    so that’s where it came from huh..

  83. chickenman | 7:12 am |

    mmmmmm…The Colonel’s secret blend of 11 Herpes and Spitties.

  84. Fietsbelle | 12:16 pm |

    Huray, herpes casserole tonight!

  85. Fietsbelle | 12:18 pm |

    No, look at the color… not so fresh anymore… Let’s have the warts tonight.

  86. AndrewGoter | 8:36 pm |

    Finally. I’m tired of being conned into buying stale herpes.

  87. DeanAckles | 8:19 pm |

    95c, the price of their hookers. It’s that or you have to pay the most to bone a spring onion

  88. Zach | 12:51 pm |

    Oh, and while you’re there, pick up some crabs…

  89. Nica | 12:11 pm |

    “Honey, I have some bad news. I went to the doctor today and found out I have month old herpes”

    “Oh, why didn’t just go to the store? They have fresh herpes!”

  90. Andrew | 5:40 am |

    Only 0.95$ that whore ripped me off!

  91. Justin | 7:27 pm |

    If allergic, substitute with AIDS.

  92. jody | 6:13 am |

    eat you’re herpes it will make you grow big and strong

  93. deviant_angel | 12:02 am |

    only 0.95! and it’s fresh! what a bargain!!!

  94. Coppola | 11:16 pm |

    herpies:$0.95
    flowers:$10
    home cooked dinner:$20
    telling your gf that she has herpes
    …..priceless

  95. Mindwave | 5:00 pm |

    lol @ the google ad for genital herpes. I wonder if they can compete with $0.95 Thats a bargain.

  96. angela | 2:12 am |

    What’s the point of buying herpes from a store when you get it free on the street?

  97. Amiel | 11:19 am |

    …. this will go well with the crab curry!!!

  98. Jackie Charlton | 9:40 pm |

    hair piece?

  99. Jackie Charlton | 9:41 pm |

    Hair pies? Don’t miss it! It’s the cheapest thing on the menu.

  100. ninjakiwizace | 8:49 am |

    95 cents? same product, but cheaper for what you can get at a whore house

  101. bubbathesnubba | 2:42 am |

    Wow they’re so cheap overseas! damn expensive domestic product!

  102. barsacampio | 3:00 pm |

    If you have to catch herpes, at least make sure it’s fresh!

  103. Matthew | 6:04 pm |

    fleshly pricked!!

  104. sanjay | 4:04 pm |

    Bad Date

    1 cup fresh herpes
    8 oz. of chlamydia
    2 3/4 lbs. of freshy grated gonorrhea
    2 bottles of white zinfandel

    mix together with a dose of regret… happy times.

  105. Donny | 6:21 pm |

    We need to bring fresh herpes, some crabs, and salmon-ella to Senator Fuk’s erection party. They’ll love it.

  106. fredrik | 8:53 am |

    can you tell me where I can find aids?

  107. neenz | 11:01 pm |

    “excuse me, are the fresh herpes local or imported?”
    “i’m not sure, let me ask the produce guy.”
    “could you? i need to know because depending on where they’re from i can just get some at home from the girl i brought home last night…thanks.”

  108. LoL Productions | 10:40 pm |

    Oh, come on, honey, but I ordered chlamydia!

  109. Rapidstriker9 | 3:22 am |

    “Riyadh brand herpes; now grown without preservatives!”

  110. Seigi | 7:40 pm |

    The next best to the manga 銀と金

  111. Dave | 9:07 pm |

    Great! Now I have the final ingredient for my Gonda-herpa-sypil-itus!

  112. Joseph Smith | 10:55 pm |

    Saudi is so cheap. You can never find fresh herpes at this price.

    Looks like Safeway near Fal center in Riyadh.

  113. K | 4:02 pm |

    Cross contamination goes a long way people

  114. drumming_panda | 5:42 pm |

    THAT’S where STD’s originated!!

  115. Loolaa | 3:20 pm |

    Lol.. Herpes… I think it happened because “p” and “b” are interchangable in Arabic, so someone thought it would be a good idea to settle with p. And hilarity ensues.

  116. Jeff | 9:31 pm |

    Cause they ran out of chlamydia…

  117. Humalien | 9:47 am |

    damn!! And i just payed 1.95 for a pound of herpes!

  118. John van Rooyen | 3:07 am |

    is it better to use fresh or dried herpes for lasagne?

  119. chieromancer | 6:20 pm |

    But are they organic?

  120. YoYO Word | 2:57 pm |

    is is a coincidence ‘Herpes’ is the cheapest?…

  121. bikenutt | 9:18 am |

    they go well with the dried rape on isle three

  122. mickeygreeneyes | 9:12 pm |

    I had stale herpes once, and, ya know, this fresh stuff might just be delicious!

  123. Baker | 4:03 pm |

    Get ’em while you can! They burst into season twice a year, but unfortunately you never know exactly when they might appear….

  124. - | 8:49 am |

    0,95 only!

  125. FatKenney | 6:00 pm |

    And all these years I’ve just been GIVING it away. If only I’d known there was a market for this stuff.

  126. helen | 10:38 pm |

    nothing is safe anymore

  127. anonymous | 6:24 pm |

    And I thought that the e coli spinach was bad…

  128. gMale | 11:31 pm |

    *Fresh* — so much better the ones you get from a can.

  129. Rawr | 3:28 am |

    Herpes:

    The full of flavour herb that makes a nice addition to salads. Farmed from proffesional hookers!

  130. charleee | 2:22 am |

    WOW! so cheap

  131. Kiwi | 3:05 am |

    I hear Hugh Hefner will give you fresh herpes really cheap.

  132. Pete | 9:07 pm |

    What a deal, only 0.95!

  133. worcirish | 6:21 pm |

    I know it starts with an H, but it is pronounced “erpies.”

  134. Mrdude | 9:42 am |

    the HIV is fresh too. It’s down the hall, next to the apple juice.

  135. loserbeep | 3:14 am |

    At last!!! I’ve been looking everywhere for these fresh herpes! and here they were at my local grocer the whole time with such an unbeatable price!

  136. Deina Lovecraft | 4:36 pm |

    Last week it was on sale along with some organic syphilis..

  137. Asian Shopper | 12:07 am |

    I wouldn’t have got the Herpes, but the CONDOMents were sooo expensive…

  138. Cj | 1:23 am |

    You can get Chlamydia over buy the apples.

  139. Cj | 1:24 am |

    You can get Chlamydia over by the apples.

  140. hihihi | 8:10 pm |

    read the fine print, people.

  141. takatomon | 11:05 am |

    that’s why you should never buy veggies wrapped in blister pack
    &
    cold sores… get your ice cold sores here!

  142. Lougem | 4:43 pm |

    Where can I find the crabs?

  143. Sharisa | 3:55 pm |

    vegetableman not wash hand?

  144. davidfreakingbowie | 7:32 am |

    I is the herpes anywhere close to the CONDOMents?

  145. iLock | 10:40 pm |

    Husband: “Oooohh fresh herpes is cheap today hun! Can I grab some?”
    Wife: *Stares wickedly and skakes head*

  146. DangerNathan | 8:00 am |

    but i dont have enough cash for the clap……..

  147. Andy | 11:54 am |

    Grocery shopping made SIMPLEX…….

  148. nukefizzix | 10:40 pm |

    That’s what you get when you pick up a 95 cent whore…

  149. Davey8 | 12:43 pm |

    Wow! Is that 95 cents for a lifetime supply?!?

  150. TitaniumGypsy | 8:53 am |

    OW! I cut myself. Any chance of band-AIDS?

  151. thedonger | 11:46 am |

    Doctor: I’m afraid you’ve got a case of herpes.
    Patient: But I swear doc, I only picked up one bunch.

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