Where do I start…

posted on 28 Feb 2009 in Chinglish

 

Photo courtesy of Calvin Armstrong.
Phone found complaining in China. 

44 captions

  1. J | 3:22 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Not to be confused with the highly critical intercom.

  2. George | 3:40 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    God damn it, my head’s been ringing all day, I can’t take it any more! People spit on me, rub their ears in me, it’s just sick…

  3. algernon | 4:17 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    What’s this! A direct line to Bangalore.

  4. DieselDragon | 4:59 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    British Telecom tried these out about ten years ago, but soon had to drop the project as the network couldn’t keep up with the demand! 😀

    [Could “complaining” actually be a bad translation of “complimentary”?]

  5. DieselDragon | 5:00 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Oh dear Gods…We have Emo telephones now? :-O

  6. someone | 5:32 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Say it, don’t spray it!

  7. dangevin | 6:20 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    “What do you mean I need to improve my listening skills?”

  8. Dominic Small | 6:20 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    If you can’t get to a telephone, just send a complaining email…

  9. beechoak | 6:35 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Why pay a telephone to nag at me when I can go home and get it for free?

  10. Sarcastik | 7:31 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Well, at least it’s not the “take revenge” telephone.

  11. EricG | 7:56 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I’m black and chained to a wall, it’s a white phone’s conspiracy against me. White phones are courtesy phones and we the black phones are slave phones to take all the abuse while the white phone gets all the glory and announcements at the airport. Instead, I get your everyday loser who treat me like crap. Why do people keep slamming me when they hang up? It’s not like they hear it when you do that. I hate my life.

  12. beechoak | 8:03 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    “I hate my life and I want to die…”

  13. Kees | 8:30 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Hey, at least it’s not a confusing door

  14. Juulie | 8:31 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    … for Marvin the Paranoid Android

  15. ozbourne | 8:58 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    The only phone that dials the suicide hotline on its own.

  16. EricG | 9:16 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Must be an AT&T phone.

  17. Ghost08 | 10:10 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    worse than my friggin mother

  18. Take2 | 10:14 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    It rings, “Biiiiitch .. . . . Biiiiitch . . . . .Biiiiitch .. . .”

  19. EricG | 11:56 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    What’s wrong with you? You never call anymore. Do you not love your phone? What did I do to deserve this? Are you too good to call your own phone? Never you mind, I’ll just sit over here and rot alone. You go ahead and go out with your fancy cars and fast girls while you ignore me, your poor old phone as I age all alone by myself after having given you dial to you for over 12 hours in the hospital.

  20. spacecoyote | 12:48 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    //Could “complaining” actually be a bad translation of “complimentary”?//

    Actually it seems to be the result of an automatic translation: Google translator translates “投诉电话” into “complaining telephone”.

  21. TheSwarm666X | 1:38 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    You think you have problems…

  22. Xila31 | 5:06 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I would rather have a complaining phone than a bulimic toilet.

  23. Jamie Brannon | 6:20 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Is it related to that one toilet that went wild?

  24. goldcaddy | 9:33 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    in China, phone complains to you.

  25. David | 10:31 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Complaining phone can be found right next to the singing bathroom!

  26. Yogesh Damle | 12:09 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    For bitching, press 1
    For whining, press 2
    For swearing, press 3

  27. Spoony | 1:28 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    “You talk with your mouth, sure. But you should see where the last guy put me!”

  28. Spoony | 1:30 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    “Oh, thank God! You have no idea how long I’ve been hanging upside down next to that stupid phone book!”

  29. Desi | 8:53 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    “Isn’t it enough when the customers complain”

  30. kringo | 6:31 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    May as well just dial my mother-in-law directly.

  31. Grifter | 6:33 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Call the nag-line for further assistance

  32. Chris | 3:50 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    This phone doesn’t work. Who do I complain to?

  33. amy | 9:23 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    by the time you finish dialing…..you forget why you were calling in the first place.

  34. PG | 10:14 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Argument phone is down the hall.

  35. tekleader | 2:15 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    “First of all, this phone number is too darn long!”

  36. luis | 8:08 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    had enough of telemarketing?

  37. AsianNinja | 12:51 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Lonely,sad or ticked off? Call the complaining hotline: just like the new Suicide Hotline!

  38. T3h Shr3dd3r | 10:28 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    “I want to complain!”
    “You want room 14b, Mr. Telephone!”

  39. Airkarat | 12:04 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    ‘Please hold…’

  40. Erin | 7:36 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Signs of the apocolypse

  41. P | 8:18 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    It’s been nagging…

  42. Charles Scroggins | 1:59 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I already have a complaining wife, I don’t need a complaining phone too!

  43. yourpetdog | 10:35 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Finally, a place to call about my girlfriend!

  44. Seventy2rd o clock | 10:53 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    – Shut up, you phone!

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