Be kidney–rewind

posted on 29 Dec 2011 in Engrish from Other Countries

Random acts of kidney

Photo courtesy of A.H.
Found at a Tesco in Hungary. 

43 captions

  1. Algernon | 4:12 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Well this just makes me liver.

  2. Tong | 4:17 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Well, you know the function of kidney don’t you? So, piss on the convoyer belt now and then piss off!

  3. faulty wiring | 4:23 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Uterus are kidney assed to prostate all gonads on the colon belt. Intestines detailing GAS may be cleaned out only on the day of aperient. Gall bladder validation at the customer surgery desk. Complaints can only be accepted if the body part is produced. Please keep your organs. Thank you for your patients and underwear.

    We use pre dickhead text erection.

  4. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:30 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I gave them my kidney. Now I’m out of patience and understanding and I want them at least to apologize for my incontinence!

  5. DrLex | 4:40 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I placed all my internal organs on the conveyor belt, but I am still waiting patiently for the receipt.

  6. SF | 4:50 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    @DrLex

    The receipt has gone down the brain.

  7. Eccekio | 4:58 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Actually the German reads OK. Must be speaking English that kills you.

  8. jjhitt | 5:32 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    This is why I don’t fly any more.

  9. FatKenney | 5:37 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    If you fail to make minimum monthly payments your kidney will be repossessed.

  10. mickeygreeneyes | 5:55 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    All that plus a speech by Hitler! Who could ask for more?

  11. Lora | 6:18 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Hmm, requesting body parts in Germany. Was this sign made by Dr, Frankenstein by any chance?

  12. Eccekio | 7:24 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    For non payment we will hack hohohohohehehe,cut hohohohoh,slice hahahahaha, disembowl, hawhahwahaw, dismember hehehehhohohohoho.

    We will have a lovely time. Won’t we kiddies?

  13. Seventy2rd o clock | 7:25 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Are you kidneying me?

  14. Eccekio | 7:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Dr Mengele is vaitink for you.

  15. Chris | 8:12 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    @ Eccekio: Also Dr. Heiter.

  16. Eccekio | 8:56 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    In the house in Rileh dead, Cluthu lies waiting.

  17. Chuck | 9:14 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Who’s the half-assed idiot using all the semi-colons ?!

  18. demondude777 | 9:43 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I’m sorry sir. I hear what you are saying, but i am not listening. If you would like me to listen to he problems you have had with our service I will need your receipt. Without that, we….well…don’t really care!

  19. Meh | 9:45 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    The title should be “Be kidney – please wewidney”. ;-p

  20. jjhitt | 11:31 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    You can put my goods on the belt.
    But you cant touch my bads.

  21. Seventy2rd o clock | 11:47 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I’m not hungary anymore.

  22. Chris | 12:12 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    @seventy2rd o clock: Good one! Wish I’d thought if it.

  23. brbr | 12:15 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Well I would have given them an Arm and a Leg, but they would only accept my kidney! Darn airport security!

  24. Peter Chan | 12:24 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    And don’t forget there is an anal increase in VAT (!!)

  25. GwydionM | 12:46 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    This sort of error rouses my spleen!

  26. Snufkin | 3:16 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    If kidney is not sufficient for your cooperation, we have other methods.

  27. Jøsh | 4:34 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Kindness failure.

  28. Seventy2rd o clock | 5:09 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Does anybody know what ‘mehrverstener’, ‘dientshalter’, ‘könnenur’ and ‘etgegen’ means?

  29. emily | 9:21 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    When people make a kidney request, we should give a hearty response.

  30. Eccekio | 9:55 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    @72rd o’ clock
    Dien/ duienen = to serve
    Schalter = switch; period of service, seniority
    Dien(en)schalter = not sure – servo-switch perhaps
    Verstehen = understand (ing)
    Mehr = majority; more; to a greater extent.
    Mehrverstehen = The understanding of the majority (is ——-)
    Entgegen = contary to; against.

    Are you sure you got the spelling correct?

    Grusse……Marum.(Die schachspielen Katze)

  31. Eccekio | 9:57 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    PS. you bet my brain with that. After all I am only a little cat.

    Grrrooowwwwllll……Marum.

  32. Eccekio | 10:03 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Typo Dien/dienen (verb)

  33. Eccekio | 10:18 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Konnen = knowledge; ability etc.
    er = he

    Honnener= who knows? know it all perhaps.

  34. Eccekio | 10:19 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Typo again = Konnener

  35. Eccekio | 11:43 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Would you please tag all your organs. In the event of a crash, we can reasseble you for burial.

  36. Eccekio | 11:43 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    EDIT: Reassemble

  37. Eccekio | 1:44 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    OK I only glanced at the German text. On closer inspection it is as stuffed as the English. But it make no sense at all – only phonetically.

    Mehrwertsteuer = Goods and services tax or V.A.T
    Dienschalter = service-desk
    (sic) Kustern dienschalter =customer service desk
    Konnenur= Sentence statrs off: Bestatigung konnen gegen Vorlage = Verification/confirmation. known against Original —-
    Gotta go – mice to catch.
    Meow meow…… Marum.

  38. DECMATH | 8:07 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Episode IV – A New Tax

    It was a time of Engrish in the Empire….

  39. Lara | 12:39 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    German is also wrong … spelling mistakes … strange combinations of words … but not as funny as English

  40. DragonLady | 3:22 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    VAT did you say???

  41. Wile E. Coyote Super Genius | 12:50 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Great … Engrish and Gelman.

  42. sparky | 9:36 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Okay, I’ll Comply – but my little dog too? no Auntie Em – Not Toto!

  43. adjfalkfjdlkah | 2:31 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    The German is just as broken as the English. Rough translation:

    We request our valued customers to place all goods on the coneyor belt. An invoice with add-fortakx we can [unreadable] on the day of payment. Receit and vali-dation of guarantees at the customer Servicedeck. Requests for returns caonly were ac epted if the receipt is produced.

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