I don’t walk the vertical way

posted on 28 Dec 2011 in Instructions

Photo courtesy of Winnie Lau.
Instructions given at train station to get to the
Instant Ramen Museum in Osaka, Japan. 

36 captions

  1. Firstborn | 4:46 am |

    Let’s see you excel me, you Momofuk-u!

  2. Seventy2rd o clock | 5:18 am |

    I think you could even outlook me if you silly walk the vertical way.

  3. jjhitt | 5:29 am |

    “Because there is a convenience store” —
    for when “because of monkeys” just isn’t enough.

  4. Algernon | 5:37 am |

    And when I walk on my hands I have no idea where I am.

  5. jjhitt | 5:39 am |

    Noodle Science sure has come a long way since I studied it in school.

  6. jjhitt | 5:44 am |

    Left walk is way of the dark side. Left leads to anger. Anger leads to Excel.
    Excel leads to Powerpoint. From Powerpoint, no returning there is.

  7. jjhitt | 5:45 am |

    Go into convenience store.
    Buy beer.
    Repeat.

  8. mickeygreeneyes | 5:54 am |

    I had no idea M.C. Escher had opened a 7-11 in Osaka!

  9. mickeygreeneyes | 5:55 am |

    Sounds like something I read in the Talmud when I was in rabbinical school.

  10. jjhitt | 6:08 am |

    And in this exhibit we see our primitive ancestors driving herds of wild ramen off a cliff to fall into the boiling springs below.

  11. Seventy2rd o clock | 6:10 am |

    We are sorry for the convenience. Store.

  12. jimbobjim | 6:22 am |

    INSTANT RAMEN MUSEUM.
    Where is your god now?

  13. jjhitt | 6:58 am |

    @ jimbobjim: Down the stairs to the right.

  14. Seventy2rd o clock | 8:04 am |

    The horizontal ‘Engrish.com’ watermark is made beautifully in style!

  15. Lora | 8:26 am |

    Whoever wrote these directions should be given fifty lashes with a wet instant ramen noodle!

  16. Seventy2rd o clock | 9:23 am |

    If I want Ramen, I’ll visit a restaurant, not a museum! Here are just a few reasons:

    – No need to silly walk
    – It is not very complicated
    – They usually apologize for the incontinence
    – Some staffs can speak English and the others cannot speak English at all (I prefer the latter)
    – A bell of a fire alarm doesn’t think other visitors are annoying
    – There are no monkeys (well, sort of)

    Also: in a restaurant, nobody excels me or the Spanish Inquisition!

  17. coffeebot | 9:36 am |

    Walk like a Momofuku

  18. jjhitt | 9:45 am |

    # You are standing in an open field west of a white house
    > Walk vertical.
    # You are at a convenience store. You die of dysentery.

  19. A Non-Y Mouse | 11:15 am |

    This is the most ingenious marketing campaign for selling instant ramen at a convenience store I have ever seen!

  20. DECMATH | 11:41 am |

    Oh you take the high road, and I’ll take the low road,
    And I’ll get to Speedway before ye

  21. Buzz Killington | 12:04 pm |

    To quote david Letterman – “Get back Momofuku, you don’t know me like that!”

  22. PaleAleRider | 1:10 pm |

    Momofuku ando horseu rodindon

  23. SuSu | 2:26 pm |

    “Excel” now has officially become a verb.
    I’m gonna excel you good, you momofuku!

  24. Darth Na'vi | 2:53 pm |

    All your Ramen Belong to Us!

  25. Tom P. | 3:16 pm |

    Directions like big Excel spleadsheet. Store at horizontal row 2, vertical column C

  26. Mark | 4:36 pm |

    The Instant Ramen Museum has its own way of doing the Hokey Pokey.

  27. Michael | 5:14 pm |

    It’s like someone put the lyrics to Helter Sketer into Babelfish several times!

  28. Eccekio | 6:17 pm |

    The Museum of fossilized Ramen Noodles. Which were recently discovered in my fridge.

  29. Eccekio | 9:00 pm |

    If you want to figure this out….USE YOUR NOODLE!

  30. AllStonedAllTheTime™ | 8:25 pm |

    His Noodly Appendages will comfort you, my child.

  31. sparky | 9:30 pm |

    Walk like an Egyptian and go to the Ramses noodle museum instead.

  32. adrasl300 | 2:31 am |

    So the only thing standing between you and being able to fly is a convenience store?
    I get it now! To transcend we must throw off all these materialistic shackles! The convenience store represents conformism, apathy and materialism. Thank you Momofuku!

  33. Chuck | 8:52 am |

    The horizontal walk.
    Is that what the kids are calling it these days ?

  34. :D | 12:56 pm |

    Just add water!

  35. confused again | 2:26 pm |

    You may have the left walk, but I have the upper hand.

  36. Reminds me of the old days | 2:32 pm |

    HP 200 MP 100
    You are at the train station.
    > Go down stairs
    > Have the left walk
    HP 200 MP 100
    You are at the convenience store.
    Momofuku is standing here
    Momofuku excels you!
    You walk the horizontal way
    HP -1 MP 100

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