Plateau Travel Instructions

posted on 31 May 2012 in Chinglish, Instructions

Photo courtesy of Jan Krogh.
Document that ppl must sign when entering
Tibet using the Beijing – Lhasa train. 

45 captions

  1. Algernon | 4:03 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Highly dangerous pregnatn women, must be the kids.

  2. Algernon | 4:04 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Funny no comments about bubonic plague, or ebola virus. Must be OK to go then.

  3. DrLex | 4:08 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    The hypertension II: the famous successor to the hypertension I.

  4. krysto4 | 4:13 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Sorry – I have to cancel my trip – I’ve caught the hysteria…

  5. Big Fat Cat | 4:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Your body temperature must be exactly = 38 C all the time else you will be forced off the plateau to your death.

  6. DrLex | 4:36 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Darling, my apparent heart heats abnormal every time I see you.

  7. Zizzybalooba | 4:37 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Hypertension II – the sequel.

  8. Zizzybalooba | 4:38 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Insane in the brain vein.

  9. Jonnytbone | 4:39 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Insane in the brain vein.

  10. Jim | 4:52 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    “I’ll just wait here at the station with these pregnant ladies – it should be safer here.”

  11. TheUnknown | 5:40 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Hypertension II: Diabetes out of Control Vs Highly Dangerous Pregnant Woman

  12. Jordan | 5:41 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    My body temperature is above or below 38C, I think it’s probably best to postpone to enter the plateau area until recovered.

  13. TheUnknown | 5:42 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    According to doctors, you probably should not ride at all

  14. Frank Burns | 6:14 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Just come out and say it ; No Americans Allowed.

  15. Pectolatra | 7:20 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Pregnant women are highly dangerous. I’ve always suspected.

  16. Lora | 8:21 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    The heavy sickness? Why don’t you just call me fat and discriminate me like they do back home?

  17. Sparky | 8:28 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Aren’t all pregnant women highly dangerous, especially in the last trimester?

  18. coffeebot | 8:48 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Biker Chicks gotta have kids, too, ya know

  19. coffeebot | 8:49 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    She got one in the oven and one in the slammer

  20. demondude777 | 8:50 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Yes I understand my wife is highly dangerous, but she is not pregnant. That is just fat! So she is good to go right?

  21. stonefield | 9:56 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    That pre-partum depression really gets worse with altitude.

  22. Peter Chan | 10:02 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    CAUTION:
    Pregnant Woman !

  23. Dane | 10:20 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Protect plateau ecological environment from highly dangerous pregnant women!

  24. Grifter | 10:57 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Quick! Stop the train! We got a breeder!

  25. GwydionM | 11:08 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Highly dangerous pregnant women can be placated with Mothercare vouncers

  26. GwydionM | 11:10 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I have abnormal heats, but much less often than 100 times per minute.

  27. Mark | 11:14 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    ‘Highly dangerous pregnant women’ –
    If you’d like to have a conversation with me, i will set fire to your genitals!

  28. mickeygreeneyes | 1:11 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Oh, my god! I have the heats again. Are there any hookers on this plateau?

  29. mickeygreeneyes | 1:13 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    If there’s one thing I hate, it’s a sanitarian. Give me a contrarian or a saurian any time.

  30. mickeygreeneyes | 1:14 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Man! And I thought medical school was hard!

  31. Nonsuch Ned | 2:33 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Her belly keeps getting bigger and bigger, either she’s going to give birth, or she’s about to explode!

  32. RT | 2:45 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    what do you mean i can’t climax until i’m physically probed by my doctor?

  33. Someone | 2:57 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Plateau, 1 year back
    - “It was terrible, suddenly pregnant women filled the entire plateau! There was no room to breathe anymore! I managed to squeeze myself past them, but lots of my friends lost their lives that day…”

  34. Marum | 4:38 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    I do have the Diabetes, but it is well mannered and not out of control, but I don’t have the Hysteria. I ask myself. “Do I have the schizophrenia?” But I hear the answer. No mate you’re Ok to go.”

  35. Marum | 4:43 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    @RT. I thought you might like to know: A Pokemon is a West Indian Proctologist.

  36. pijo | 7:33 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Thank God my heart heats are below 100 times per minute

  37. Seventy2rd o clock | 8:46 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I usually got a body plateau of exactly above 38 highly dangerous hysterical pregnant women, sometimes even 100 below per minute, so I’m knot exactly highly confusing what to do.
    Sometimely.

  38. Seventy2rd o clock | 8:48 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I got Matrix II so I’ll stay at home.

  39. Seventy2rd o clock | 9:01 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I reached plateau of hysterical laughter after reading this.

  40. lygia | 11:40 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    I lost interest in going to the Plateau

  41. garudamon11 | 4:24 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Destroy the ecological environment?

  42. Pengwyn | 3:27 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Oh, the Hysteria!

  43. Hugh Casement | 10:59 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Is it a malignant pregnancy, madam, or merely the contagious variety?

  44. Magnus | 9:11 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Look out for the higly dangerous pregnant woman, she is gonna drop a child on you!

  45. tim | 8:16 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Why do they allow the pregnant women to roam free like that?

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