Then open the door to turn the knob

posted on 6 Jun 2012 in Chinglish, Instructions

Photo courtesy of John Haines.
Found in China.  

50 captions

  1. Big Fat Cat | 4:04 am |

    Push the button and a bellboy will show up to flush the toilet for you.

  2. Algernon | 4:06 am |

    Or maybe ring a bell

  3. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:07 am |

    But Don’t Flush Toilet To Pee

  4. pijo | 4:25 am |

    What happen if I just push the button without flushing the toilet?

  5. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:32 am |

    And never forget to wash hands before dirty.

  6. jjhitt | 4:34 am |

    The Chinese space program faces many difficulties. This is one of them.

  7. mickeygreeneyes | 4:40 am |

    Take toilet paper to cause bowel movement.

  8. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:46 am |

    I can’t pee to push a light switch, so I’m sorry for incontinence.

  9. Tong | 4:52 am |

    This high tech toilet is hydropowered. Flush, and a botton will be pushed. Always find the right botton to push though.

  10. Tong | 4:53 am |

    To flush or to push a button, that is the question.

  11. Droll not Troll | 5:05 am |

    Now I’m worried. What if everything I just did goes into reverse? 😯

  12. faulty wiring | 5:07 am |

    Monsieur Strauss Kahn, the urinal is free

  13. DrLex | 5:08 am |

    Push car to turn ignition key.
    Pry open safe with crowbar to unlock lock.
    Throw bullet forward to pull trigger.
    Push nail into wall to swing hammer.
    Climb up elevator shaft to call elevator.

    In communist China, result performs action.

  14. Frank Burns | 5:12 am |

    Its the old chicken vs egg delema.

  15. jjhitt | 5:17 am |

    “Destruct sequence armed. Awaiting executive and commanding officers to flush in unison to activate.”

  16. pijo | 5:18 am |

    Looks like a bell ringing button …

  17. J-Luke | 5:43 am |

    …then raise toilet seat to push B button.
    It’s a new game from Flushing Meadows…

  18. Salome | 5:49 am |

    Exit to open door.

  19. Jonnytbone | 6:21 am |

    Sign on Yoda’s toilet.

  20. Seventy2rd o clock | 6:43 am |

    It would be a lot easier to activate it through one of social networks…

  21. jjhitt | 6:47 am |

    Ding-A-Ling to press once.
    Clapper In The Crapper to press twice.

  22. Peter Chan | 6:53 am |

    Some people die for getting killed. Now I understand how.

  23. Gtancx | 7:09 am |

    Ok.. get it.. But I still don’t know when shall I push the B button??

  24. Chris | 7:22 am |

    You’re looking a little flushed.

  25. coffeebot | 7:22 am |

    Wipe butt to open stall

  26. jjhitt | 7:24 am |

    “Clap On, Clap Off … it’s the Crapper.”

  27. Biff the Understudy | 7:31 am |

    I remember this puzzle from the original Myst game.

  28. Grifter | 7:31 am |

    That idea is all flushed up.

  29. Classic Steve | 7:55 am |

    The bell is upside-down. That makes sense in context, actually.

  30. demondude777 | 8:42 am |

    Need 30 flushes? Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, B, A, Start.

  31. Lora | 10:03 am |

    Never hire Yoda to write simple bathroom instructions.

  32. jjhitt | 10:29 am |

    If you have toilet trouble, do you call a plumber, electrician or Quasimodo?

  33. DeeDee | 11:01 am |

    Oooooh! What is this toilet for?

  34. jorn | 11:09 am |

    In Soviet China, toilet flush you!

  35. Seventy2rd o clock | 11:14 am |

    Make sure you always lock yourself inside before you enter.

  36. Peter | 12:08 pm |

    Ever notice how much an upside-down bell resembles a urinal?

  37. Frank Burns | 12:56 pm |

    Gravity caused me to miss, so I don’t need to flush.

  38. d17nk | 3:16 pm |

    Urinate to drink water.

  39. RT | 3:16 pm |

    confusing me, this is
    -yoda

  40. Marum | 5:11 pm |

    Then in the hallway, I was confronted by a man in a wheelchair with no legs.

  41. Jewels | 5:38 pm |

    Lurch (from Adams Family), breathing down your neck: You rang?

  42. marietta | 7:29 pm |

    Yoda?

  43. Danica | 7:38 pm |

    The button is upside-down! THIS IS MADNESS!! The caption should have really been: “Meanwhile, in Australia…”

  44. A non-ymous | 9:48 am |

    The button actually signals a handbell choir to start playing Handel’s Water Music.

  45. Sparky | 2:53 pm |

    Urinate to pee.

  46. Jøsh | 2:51 am |

    Poo I has too!!!
    -Yoda

  47. Antr | 1:17 pm |

    How did that confusion of cause and result happen? Literal translation without considering context?

  48. 2LZ | 1:37 am |

    so the button is hidden in the toilet? can we dig gold from there onwards?

  49. tim | 8:24 pm |

    Here’s the part that will blow your mind; push the button to flush the toilet…

  50. QueensEngrish | 8:55 pm |

    Don’t forget to make a call to dial a number.

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