I’ll make sure you get cookies

posted on 8 Oct 2012 in Chinglish

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Photo courtesy of Emily Kneeland.
Found in hotel room in Beijing, China. 

38 captions

  1. Algernon | 4:11 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Its a static thing

  2. SF | 4:19 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    I’m sure I put it there just a moment ago. Has anybody a backup?

  3. DrLex | 4:19 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    It’s hard enough already to find stuff on the internet in China, so don’t make it any harder.

  4. Jonnytbone | 4:21 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    And I thought the Facebook timeline was a bad idea.

  5. iLock | 4:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    Please don’t move the letter t away from the apostrophe.

  6. Tong | 4:27 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Virtual space is very difficult to find.

  7. jjhitt | 4:31 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    It keeps the table from wiggling.

  8. iLock | 4:32 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Please don’t move the Internet, it’s very sensitive
    and crying could short circuit itself.

  9. coffeebot | 4:54 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    Who moved my homepage?

  10. Droll not Troll | 5:03 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    The Internet is quite happy where it is, just a bit to the left of reality.

  11. pijo | 5:27 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    I will only move the computer, I’ll leave Internet there …

  12. The_YongGrand | 5:57 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    “Dude, where’s my internet?” 😀

  13. Classic Steve | 6:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Only boring stories allowed.

  14. Droll not Troll | 6:36 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 1  

    Can I just stimulate its bits?

  15. Pectolatra | 7:13 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Last time someone did it, the cats dropped all over the place.

  16. Pectolatra | 7:15 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    You don’t want the trolls to tear you into pieces, do you?

  17. Chris | 7:18 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    It’s just a jump to the left.

  18. Ben | 7:20 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    I have AT&T. Trust me, my internet isn’t moving very fast at all.

  19. Seventy2rd o clock | 8:07 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    If it’s mobile it moves by itself

  20. Seventy2rd o clock | 8:17 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    And don’t drill holes into the Cyberspace.

  21. GwydionM | 8:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    it would be hor ribble if the wo rds got brok en in the mo ve.

  22. demondude777 | 8:41 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    Boy: Dad, what did you bring back from China for me?

    Dad: Son, here is the whole internet…enjoy!

  23. Seventy2rd o clock | 8:50 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    I moved it and it came back!

  24. Biff the Understudy | 9:11 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Great, now Wikipedia is going to have another blackout campaign.

  25. davonblr | 9:42 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    It’s fine to keep it there, but you might want to cover it up bc viruses have been going around the office. And please don’t leave your Spam lying open! No one wants to share that mess with you.

  26. Sparky | 10:38 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Attn: Please don’t move.

    From: The Internet

  27. Peter Chan | 11:16 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Ok, then I shall download the Internet.

  28. Marum | 12:57 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    It followed me home mummy. Can I keep it?

  29. Seventy2rd o clock | 1:14 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    ”Freeze!”

  30. demondude777 | 2:06 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Yes my name is Don T. Where would you like me to put this internet you ordered now?

  31. mickeygreeneyes | 2:28 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    We like it where it IS! You got a problem with that?
    –The Teamsters Union

  32. Marum | 5:38 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    i before e except after c.
    No space before t except after an apostophe.

  33. Droll not Troll | 10:44 pm |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    It takes experts to move an Internet. Somebody has to disconnect all the You Tubes and if there’s a p0rn spill it will need special decontamination procedures.
    Then when it’s in the new position it must be adjusted so that Craigslist is listing at the correct angle.

  34. Jøsh | 11:22 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Me calling desk- “My room lost internet”
    Annoyed Clerk- “Sir, did you move it?”

  35. Peter | 5:25 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    The Elders of the Internet request that you don’ t move it.

  36. Pete | 1:55 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 1  

    Son, I just got back from Beijing and brought you the entire Great Firewall of China for a gift!

    (Actually the sign reads “Please don’t move the COMPUTER.”

  37. Johm | 1:36 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    No Internets for you.

  38. Myself | 5:47 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Ah, the novelization of the Internet is finally out!

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