But Mr. Lifeguard, it’s just acne…

posted on 21 Feb 2013 in Chinglish, Signs

You must be THIS hungry to swim here…

Photo courtesy of Emily Landon.
Found in China. 

40 captions

  1. Algernon | 4:11 am |

    Party poopers

  2. Algernon | 4:12 am |

    Nice to know they’re friendly

  3. Tong | 4:18 am |

    Damn that English speaking lamb rips. One too many, now I can’s swim.

  4. Droll not Troll | 4:20 am |

    I once caught ect from swimming in a dirty pool but I’m cured now.

  5. Droll not Troll | 4:22 am |

    Er… how do you know if you’re suffering from an epidemic?

  6. JohnZ | 4:28 am |

    Dare to pee in our pool, and we will introduce you to our deathguard.

  7. Droll not Troll | 4:28 am |

    Any man who has dong fang is required to wear a muzzle in his speedos.

  8. jjhitt | 4:38 am |

    Beach party moved to industrial canal due to being overeaten.

  9. Tong | 4:41 am |

    People have the above conditions, please do not go into the pool. Meet in hell, I mean the hall…

  10. jjhitt | 4:56 am |

    With a name like Dong Fang, you have to be kind.

  11. Big Fat Cat | 5:16 am |

    If you swim with those conditions, we will send you with our not so kind reminders- meet our red guards.

  12. Jonnytbone | 5:18 am |

    Doug Fang must be the Donald Trump of China. And just as obnoxious.

  13. Seventy2rd o clock | 5:20 am |

    For undereaten guest only

  14. Seventy2rd o clock | 5:23 am |

    NOTE: Our dong prohibits rubbing the old horny

  15. Pectolatra | 5:46 am |

    Why does venereal disease prohibits you to swim in there?
    It’s not like you’re going to have sex in the pool…
    …is it? 😳

  16. Mr. Wrong | 5:48 am |

    The Five Horsemen of the Apocalypse (Heart Disease, Psychosis, Epidemics, Overeaten and Drunkenness) are not welcome here.

  17. Mr. Wrong | 5:50 am |

    DNT: I got my ect off a toilet seat.

  18. Mr. Wrong | 5:51 am |

    So if we only have five of the six epidemics, we can swim here, right?

  19. Seventy2rd o clock | 5:56 am |

    PS: Bring out the dead! … Bring out the dead! … Bring out the dead!

  20. Mr. Wrong | 5:57 am |

    Our clients may be a bunch of disease-ridden drunks, but at least we keep them out of the pool. Be confident they haven’t touched any other surface in the hotel, and enjoy your visit!

  21. Droll not Troll | 5:58 am |

    Women who have been overeaten should stay away from the old horny.

  22. Mr. Wrong | 6:00 am |

    This pool is protected from disease by a sign. Swim at own risk.

  23. Seventy2rd o clock | 6:09 am |

    Our Dong speaks English!

  24. Sparky | 6:30 am |

    I have drunkenness …what does this mean?

  25. Stopchicks | 6:32 am |

    Sorry, you’re too crazy to swim here. You’ve gone off the deep end. We recommend trying Bad Gene Pool, a block down the street.

  26. Classic Steve | 7:23 am |

    Ironically, you need a psychosis to *want* to swim here.

  27. jjhitt | 7:27 am |

    I’m Anna Rexia and I approved this message.

  28. emily | 8:05 am |

    It seems overeating makes one heavier and increases the risk of sinking……

  29. Droll not Troll | 8:47 am |

    @emily: ………not to mention the possibility of blowing chunks in the pool.

  30. Biff the Understudy | 10:47 am |

    ECT: Escherichia coli Terribilis?

  31. Lobo | 10:53 am |

    and that is the KIND reminder…

  32. GwydionM | 11:48 am |

    People just partly eaten are OK.

  33. Lora | 1:54 pm |

    Whatever happened to just “No Running”? :-(

  34. Biff the Understudy | 2:07 pm |

    They forgot to mention hullabaloo.

  35. Jewels | 6:56 pm |

    At first glance.. I thought the four things at the bottom were dying/dead roaches and thought with that standard of cleanliness… no wonder they fear epidemics….

  36. raeme67 | 4:16 pm |

    Hey, you fat, pox-marked, heart disease ridden, druken,psyco, TB patient with occasional epidemics, just keep moving you are not wanted here!

  37. Doctor Q | 1:21 pm |

    Children are not allowed here.

  38. The Blob | 7:17 pm |

    This is the pool? Oh, I’m sorry… my psychosis… I thought this was the lava basin.

  39. The Blob | 7:18 pm |

    What do you mean I have to leave! The sign says no swimming allowed; nothing about drowning!

  40. Susan | 1:09 pm |

    We can have our own epidemics?

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