Welcome menu

posted on 23 Jul 2013 in Chinglish, Menus

Photo courtesy of Ian.
Menu found in China. 

71 captions

  1. Jonnytbone | 4:03 am |  Vote: Add rating 81  Subtract rating 2  

    The Farmer Takes The Wife.

  2. Droll not Troll | 4:03 am |  Vote: Add rating 51  Subtract rating 2  

    Soil beans are used to make turfu.

  3. algernon | 4:03 am |  Vote: Add rating 58  Subtract rating 1  

    Be careful of the raping mushrooms when they explode the chicken cube

  4. algernon | 4:05 am |  Vote: Add rating 50  Subtract rating 1  

    I suppose the chicken does slip away when the chicken cube explodes the temple.

  5. algernon | 4:06 am |  Vote: Add rating 28  Subtract rating 2  

    A beer or a coke is comforting afterwards

  6. Droll not Troll | 4:09 am |  Vote: Add rating 45  Subtract rating 2  

    The black mushrooms were framed! It was the toads tools!

  7. DrLex | 4:11 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 6  

    Forget about high five. The new fashion is styn five!

  8. Droll not Troll | 4:12 am |  Vote: Add rating 37  Subtract rating 2  

    I don’t want the sugar vinegar in my ridge. It stings like f*ck!

  9. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:12 am |  Vote: Add rating 46  Subtract rating 0  

    Welcome… To food wars

  10. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:12 am |  Vote: Add rating 28  Subtract rating 0  

    All I Wanted Was A Drink

  11. DrLex | 4:12 am |  Vote: Add rating 10  Subtract rating 0  

    Do not slip away the chicken slices into the temple, or they’ll explode too.

  12. DrLex | 4:15 am |  Vote: Add rating 22  Subtract rating 0  

    Welcome. Bomb-and-fireproof suits will be provided by your waiter.

  13. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:16 am |  Vote: Add rating 14  Subtract rating 0  

    The water always boils the beef… The temple always explodes the chicken cube… Styn Always Fived Pine Seeds withcorn… Why not vice-versa?

    Ah… Nevermind.

  14. coffeebot | 4:20 am |  Vote: Add rating 41  Subtract rating 1  

    Get your white pointy hat! Mushroom lynching tonight!

  15. jjhitt | 4:22 am |  Vote: Add rating 20  Subtract rating 0  

    “The temple explodes the chicken cube” — Wasn’t that what the Hellraiser movies were about?

  16. Stopchicks | 4:24 am |  Vote: Add rating 56  Subtract rating 1  

    The menu confuses the brain.

  17. Big Fat Cat | 4:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 28  Subtract rating 0  

    This menu is designed for Indiana Jones. It’s so adventurous.

  18. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:27 am |  Vote: Add rating 4  Subtract rating 0  

    @ jjhitt: I always thought Cenobites did that.

  19. jjhitt | 4:29 am |  Vote: Add rating 15  Subtract rating 1  

    Now this sounds like my kind of religion!

  20. jjhitt | 4:40 am |  Vote: Add rating 62  Subtract rating 1  

    If it’s a legitimate mushroom rape, the chicken body has ways to shut the whole thing down. By exploding.

  21. Seventy2rd o clock | 4:45 am |  Vote: Add rating 27  Subtract rating 0  

    Violence of the Lambs?

  22. Droll not Troll | 4:46 am |  Vote: Add rating 16  Subtract rating 1  

    @jhitt: Now that’s what I call a gang bang!

  23. Timmy | 5:24 am |  Vote: Add rating 17  Subtract rating 1  

    Keep that black mushroom in your pants!

  24. Frank Burns | 6:24 am |  Vote: Add rating 38  Subtract rating 1  

    Thats kind of shiitake to always blame the black mushrooms.

  25. Frank Burns | 6:30 am |  Vote: Add rating 25  Subtract rating 0  

    It was very difficult to cross a chicken and a silk worm, but the noodles are worth it.

  26. Biff the Understudy | 6:44 am |  Vote: Add rating 16  Subtract rating 1  

    The water boils the beef or it gets the hose again.

  27. jjhitt | 7:15 am |  Vote: Add rating 16  Subtract rating 1  

    Knock Knock — Hi, I’m Elder Soil Bean, could we talk to you for a few minutes about the Exploding Chicken and what his Cube means to you?

  28. Marum | 7:35 am |  Vote: Add rating 11  Subtract rating 2  

    Black Mushroom Rape.

    They must be Toad’s tools.

  29. Classic Steve | 7:37 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    @Biff: By which you mean it gets shot out of the hose again?

  30. Marum | 8:00 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    The restaurant at the end of the Una voca.

  31. Jay | 8:52 am |  Vote: Add rating 10  Subtract rating 3  

    And the inevitable: in Communist China water boils YOU!

  32. Biff the Understudy | 9:07 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    @Steve: Or put back in the hose. Either way, the hose is not a place anyone wants to be. Especially not water. Or beef.

  33. Biff the Understudy | 9:11 am |  Vote: Add rating 15  Subtract rating 0  

    Exploding? Burning? Rape? Slipping away? This menu was written by ninjas, or Genghis Khan.

  34. DanT | 11:25 am |  Vote: Add rating 8  Subtract rating 1  

    Uh…I’ll just have a Coca-Cola, please

  35. Peter | 11:26 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 3  

    Black mushrooms rape . . . or being raped?

  36. Seventy2rd o clock | 11:29 am |  Vote: Add rating 9  Subtract rating 2  

    – Medium-raped mushrooms, and French fries the temple. With Mayo crime, please.

  37. Sparky | 12:37 pm |  Vote: Add rating 3  Subtract rating 3  

    This what the menu looks like when you’re stone. EIEIOH!

  38. Lora | 1:18 pm |  Vote: Add rating 8  Subtract rating 1  

    The chicken slip away because…it’s chicken! *dodges tomato*

  39. Jim | 1:52 pm |  Vote: Add rating 3  Subtract rating 0  

    They do have beer, so there’s that.

  40. Jøshua | 2:58 pm |  Vote: Add rating 14  Subtract rating 0  

    The Beans Soil the Pants

  41. NoizeBomb | 3:03 pm |  Vote: Add rating 7  Subtract rating 1  

    No wonder why the chicken cube doesn’t exist. The Temple raged so hard that the chicken cube exploded.

  42. Marum | 3:20 pm |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 1  

    I’ve got a shitake on all of this.

  43. RiceKitty | 7:12 pm |  Vote: Add rating 12  Subtract rating 0  

    When Iron Chef meets The Hunger Games…

  44. Snickers | 2:27 am |  Vote: Add rating 3  Subtract rating 0  

    Someone’s got beef for the beef

  45. A. Tsang | 4:49 am |  Vote: Add rating 21  Subtract rating 1  

    The temple explodes the chicken cube → Spicy diced chicken
    The soil bean burns the beef → Braised beef and potatoes
    The water boils the beef → Braised beef
    Chicken silk noodles → Noodles with shredded chicken
    Black mushroom rape → Bok choi with Shiitake mushrooms

  46. Frank Burns | 5:46 am |  Vote: Add rating 5  Subtract rating 7  

    A. Tsang doesn’t get it.

  47. Biff the Understudy | 9:15 am |  Vote: Add rating 11  Subtract rating 0  

    OK that does it. From now on I’m calling potatoes “soil beans”!

  48. Marum | 2:29 pm |  Vote: Add rating 8  Subtract rating 0  

    @A. Tsang. Thank you. May I assume: Beer → Beer.

  49. Marum | 2:31 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Or maybe ith cath pith!

  50. d17nk | 5:17 pm |  Vote: Add rating 21  Subtract rating 1  

    “The temple explodes the chicken cube” is originated from Southern part of China, belongs to the Cantonese cooking style. The original name is “宮寶鷄丁“ but got lost in the Cantonese-to-Mandarin translation when it got carried over to the rest of China. The original name literally means Palace Treasure Chicken Cube. But the “treasure” part somehow became “explode” when it got translated into Mandarin. Hence we have the funny Engrish version, “The temple explodes the chicken cube” :)

  51. Fredly | 6:47 pm |  Vote: Add rating 3  Subtract rating 0  

    Chicken, Beef, silk noodles…Kooky! But Black Mushrooms Rape? No spank you!

  52. Skeered | 6:42 am |  Vote: Add rating 6  Subtract rating 0  

    It puts the lotion on the beef

  53. james | 10:05 pm |  Vote: Add rating 8  Subtract rating 0  

    Stay away from the black mushrooms.

  54. SM0k3 | 10:26 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    where’s the “It puts the lotion on the skin.”

  55. exsy | 5:36 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 2  

    Hahahahaha… The temple explodes the chicken cube :)

  56. donny | 5:22 am |  Vote: Add rating 7  Subtract rating 0  

    Yes, I’ll have the temple chicken cube – with extra explosions, and the lady would like the black mushrooms – heavy on the rape. Oh, and some extra napkins, please.

  57. HankW | 10:12 pm |  Vote: Add rating 4  Subtract rating 0  

    Don’t blame the black mushrooms; they were forced into it.

  58. JulieM | 3:57 am |  Vote: Add rating 4  Subtract rating 0  

    And the beef jumps over the moon!

  59. Rita | 11:16 am |  Vote: Add rating 8  Subtract rating 0  

    Welcome and run for your life, before your chicken explodes and your black mushroom rapes!

  60. passer-by | 2:38 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 2  

    @d17nk:

    It should be 宮「保」雞丁, not 「寶」(although it’s also acceptable); and it originated from 四川, not 廣州. For more detailed information, pls go visit Wiki.

  61. Austin | 7:47 pm |  Vote: Add rating 3  Subtract rating 0  

    Beware the black mushrooms!

  62. TC | 9:27 pm |  Vote: Add rating 6  Subtract rating 0  

    People have been accusing black mushrooms of rape for centuries. It’s racism at its worst.

  63. Ponyboy | 5:44 pm |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    The temple explodes the chicken cube 宮保雞丁 = Kung Pao Chicken…

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kung_Pao_chicken

  64. Enclave | 2:28 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    Black Mushroom Rape sounds like a good name for a song!

  65. Casey Goranson | 4:09 pm |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 0  

    Coming soon to a dinner plate near you…

  66. Soso | 9:37 am |  Vote: Add rating 2  Subtract rating 0  

    My favorite bedtime story

  67. ERIC | 3:53 am |  Vote: Add rating 1  Subtract rating 3  

    Hey at least they got “black” and “rape” right, together in the same sentence.

  68. David O | 1:23 pm |  Vote: Add rating 6  Subtract rating 0  

    The black mushrooms constitute a manifest contradiction on this menu. If you order the black mushroom rape, you want it. And logically you can’t rape the willing. So the menu item should be changed to “black mushroom rough sex” for greater accuracy.

  69. katsia | 2:16 am |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Show must go on, yeah?

  70. Click me | 4:08 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    When the chicken slice slips away, it is exploded by the temple and becomes chicken silk

  71. Petey | 2:21 pm |  Vote: Add rating 0  Subtract rating 0  

    Slip away the chicken slice and unleash the dogs of war.

Caption is made at here!

Caption is made at here! (please leave a caption for the Engrish photo; all vulgar entries, spam, etc. will be deleted. Let's Creative!)

Home | Brog | Store | Massage Board | Advertise | Contact Us | Disclaimer

© 1999 - 2013 Engrish.com. All rights reserved.