Everybody is so skinny around here…

posted on 25 Aug 2016 in Instructions, Signs

never-dont-sleep

Never don’t check out before 11.

Photo courtesy of Matthew Wilkens.
Found in hotel in Sagamihara, Japan. 

42 captions

  1. Huu Yuu | 4:01 am |

    This hotel has the most heavy blankets in the world.

  2. algernon | 4:02 am |

    Nwver don’t blankets as sheet

  3. Huu Yuu | 4:03 am |

    A good ex …… is one squeezed to death in the blankets.

  4. algernon | 4:04 am |

    Blankets divide nicely into sheets

  5. Huu Yuu | 4:07 am |

    I never don’t make sure that I do not ‘sheet’ the bed in my sleeping.

  6. Droll not Troll | 4:15 am |

    People who want to tell me how to sleep really give me the sheets!

  7. Droll not Troll | 4:16 am |

    Can I get a good ex and bacon breakfast here?

  8. DrLex | 4:17 am |

    Judging from the image, they are talking about unbendable sheet metal. No wonder that person is so flat.

  9. Droll not Troll | 4:19 am |

    Never don’t not use double negatives.

  10. Droll not Troll | 4:21 am |

    The blankets on these beds have an R 3.5 insulation rating.

  11. Droll not Troll | 4:24 am |

    The puce coloured object is a pillow case; the yellow object is a basket case.

  12. jjhitt | 4:25 am |

    Are there — are there — Sheets between the blankets on that distant shore?
    Quoth the Raven: “Never don’t”.

  13. Droll not Troll | 4:28 am |

    I know a blanket directive when I see one.

  14. Yu No Hoo | 4:30 am |

    I wouldn’t dream of it.

  15. Yu No Hoo | 4:41 am |

    Sleep directly in blankets, but don’t get cot.

  16. Big Fat Cat | 4:45 am |

    A good ex is one who turns a blind eye on you when she discovered you sleeping with another woman under heavy blanket

  17. Yu No Hoo | 4:55 am |

    I don’t give a sheet about your rules.

    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

  18. Frank Burns | 5:04 am |

    Does anyone else find it funny that they used a yellow figure in the sign?

  19. Conventi | 5:08 am |

    What is it, sheed instructions for strangely formed robots ?

  20. Pete | 5:41 am |

    Hey…I used to live in Sagamihara….!!!

  21. Pete | 5:41 am |

    Well, looks like Flat Stanley’s residence has finally been identified!

  22. Pete | 5:44 am |

    The person in that “Ex” is either a paraplegic or has incredibly long arms!!!

  23. Pete | 5:45 am |

    …or maybe that’s what happens after the YW van guys come to visit?

  24. Marum | 5:55 am |

    Yer gottit wrong Tojo. You’re lying under the bloody mattress.

  25. Marum | 5:56 am |

    SHEET HEY!!!

  26. Marum | 6:02 am |

    I see. His ex has put a contract out on him. So they’ve stuck him in a cement bed, before taking him out to the 1,000 fathom line.

  27. Marum | 6:05 am |

    @BFC 0445. A competitive ex is one who joins you both, to try to prove she’s still better than any GF you can dredge up.

  28. alexmagnus | 6:58 am |

    Broken neck, no armd, thinnest legs in the world, unbendable sheet and two blankets. Damn, this picture is a stuff for horror movies. For some weird reason it reminded me of “The Skeleton Key”

  29. iLock | 7:21 am |

    You can always tear a hole with your needle legs in case you need to get out from being inside the sheets.

  30. iLock | 7:25 am |

    All your sheets are belong on us

  31. iLock | 7:26 am |

    I thought I had figured out a way to visually depict a blanket… But I’m just drawing a blank.

  32. iLock | 7:32 am |

    Rubber ducky, you were the one, but you made sleep time so unfun!
    Rubber ducky, don’t you feel awfully suffocated under these blankets too!

  33. Lora | 8:45 am |

    Are these blankets like the sun, where you never don’t look directly at it?

  34. Geo | 9:26 am |

    Also, don’t never use no pillows without pillowcases. Otherwise you might dream about your “good” ex, if you have one.

  35. Rt | 1:53 pm |

    I too, like to sleep with layers of 10 gauge sheet metal

  36. timmy | 10:06 pm |

    That yellow guy looks like he’s three sheets to the wind.

  37. “It was then I realized that a world which needed instructions to sleep in a hotel bed was a world I could not live in and stay sane.”

  38. A Non-Y Mouse | 1:54 am |

    My good ex was really good between the sheets. My bad ex left the covers scattered all over every morning.

  39. Marum | 8:53 am |

    Our Flats are really flat.

  40. Seventy2rd o clock | 1:22 am |

    Sheet happens

  41. Seventy2rd o clock | 1:24 am |

    I’ll be damned if I’ll ever don’t do it

  42. markm | 7:16 pm |

    They seem to have ironed the sheets with much too much starch.

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