Human lost and found just got easier.

And I am here

Wouldn’t help. I’m not myself today.

I am lost

Actually. By the look on her face, she’s not all there.

I am here, not her

Wherever you go, there you are.

Ah, but how do you know I’m me?

Chinese welcome mat.

@DNT 0412. Never knew “Matt” was an old Chinese name.

Musapha bin Matt Zedong.

Mission accomplished! Now what?

That makes sense. Mao is three random letters which mean nothing.

Yes. Matt Zedong makes more sense. The only name which would be better, is Bruce.

A: To be here or not to be here, that is the…
B: No, ya Dingdong! The question is “Are you gonna move outta the way or not? Coz yer blockin’ me here on the moving sidewalk an’ I’m scrambling to catch my flight!!!

Bruce Zedong, would be instantly acceptable in Australia.

(Don’t expect any Americans to get that. Unless they’ve lived for years in Oz)

…. now go over there so someone else can be here.

♫Don’t stand under the airport sign,
With anyone else than Brian.𜲦

@Marum | 4:21 am: I have lived in Oz most of my life. I don’t get that. Maybe it’s a regional joke. 😕

But this is not here.

OK, just stay there. If you are stolen, change the sign and call the police at once.

@DNT 0421. Used to be an old joke (possibly a bit dated) that every second person was named Bruce. Last heard it on a radio skit, about 16 years ago.

Just like the old joke: All Australian names finish in “ie”. That way you can scream them three blocks further..

Monty Python Bruce Sketch.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNBy1D1Y0h4

Also: http://www.smh.com.au/comment/its-time-to-bring-back-the-bruce-20140326-zqn7a.html

WARNING

If you are not a least marginally homophobic, don’t read this.9978;

⛺

@Marum & DnT,

I used to be buds (American for “mates”) with a couple of Ozzie guys.
One was named Malcolm and the other was named Nicholas.

Neither one was the type where I’d feel comfy yelling “Hey, Nicky”…and definitely not “Hey Malkie”.

Maybe their last names shoulda been “Notzedong”.
: )

@Marum, 4:19: “Is your name not Bruce then?”

But I thought I was there! Oh, my life is a lie!

This helps a lot :D!!! I always knew I was here!

Did she just come from a cherry pie eating contest?

@Frank Burns 10:38,

Good grief!!!! I didn’t notice her shirt until you just mentioned it.
She looks like she spilled a Slurpee all over Laowai Self!!!

Come to think of it, the sign does sound kinda new-agey, as in “Be Here Now” or something like that….

@Pete & Marum: I always blamed the Python sketch for making the name Bruce legendary in Oz. I have only met 2 blokes bearing that name in my whole life. In one place where I worked there were the 2 Bruces but 5 or 6 Rodneys and maybe 4 Dennises.
OTOH, listening to the Fred Dagg sketches by the late John Clarke led me to believe that Trevor must be the most common name in NZ.

@Frank Burns | 10:38 am: If not for the smile, one could think she just got off a United flight!

@DnT and Marum,

I suddenly remenbered…the leader of the 3 Aussie sharks in Finding Nemo was…you guessed it: Bruce!

@Pete | 6:29 pm: That’s right! BTW, The name of the actor is Barry Humphries. He was always big on Aussie stereotypes.

Chris 0708. You may call me anything, as long as it is not, “late for dinner”.

@Chris. BTW. Actually it’s Ralph.
Which causes an interesting side effect.
No matter how effectively I entertained my Asian lady, she couldn’t scream out my name.
So she usually bit me somewhere, or anywhere.😍

That sign must have been made in the 1960’s, when it was popular for people to “find themselves”.

Ok that’s more than obvious. But too bad nobody has the heart to love you, as clearly shown in the Chinese character shown on the right of the pic without the ‘heart’ in it.