Please first impress.

Beware nasty

Depends where you meet

Butt gently.

Big Brother is watching!

I prefer to meat in a restaurant

– Mommy, why do you never meet?

… last suddenness happens!

*edit* … lest suddenness happens!
(From a post in 2008)

Vagatable recklessly

I bumped into an old friend yesterday.

First impress best, shake him firmly.

If you don’t treat the meat carefully – It may spit at you.

That’s the idea behind people bowing toward each other in Asian cultures, as opposed to shaking hands or hugging in the West.

Yeah, try Craig’s list……

Do your part.

@Yu No Hoo 0613. It is miles more fun if you have someone else do it instead.

Hi, my name is Concrete. Nice meeting you.

If you don’t meet her carefully, just meat her.

… or you will be hearing from our solicitous!

Totally off-post, but contains lots of Engrish, some of which has been posted here before:
click here

What most dating websites won’t tell you…

The advantage of bowing over handshaking is that the former doesn’t spread germs. A good thing too, as China is practically a flu virus factory.

@EffEff 2101. However. If you get the timing wrong and belt your heads together it doesn’t help. There is something to be said for terminal clumsiness.