I don’t see whiskey…

posted on 14 May 2018 in Chinglish, Signs

mens-needs

Photo courtesy of Suzanne Tung.
Found in China. 

21 captions

  1. Algernon | 4:02 am |

    The ladies on the left beg to differ

  2. Algernon | 4:03 am |

    Found in the Suck Ho building

  3. Droll not Troll | 4:04 am |

    I know a couple of men who need good kick up the arse – but how would someone package that?

  4. Yu No Hoo | 4:20 am |

    If you need to fart, this is the place.

  5. seventy2rd o clock | 4:25 am |

    Next to ‘needful things’

  6. seventy2rd o clock | 4:28 am |

    – Need something else, Sir?
    – Yes. A woman, please.

  7. DrLex | 4:30 am |

    It seems that the Ladies Beauty Centre is part of Men’s needs…

  8. coffeebot | 4:46 am |

    That time of the month?

  9. Droll not Troll | 4:57 am |

    A couple of packs of 8 hours’ sleep, please.

  10. Marum | 5:32 am |

    Mens needs?

    Old wine.
    New money.
    Young women.

    I’ll have mine to go thanks.

  11. Marum | 5:45 am |

    This lucky man, had three women who wanted to marry him. To help himself choose, he gave each of them $10,000.00 and a month t0o see what happened.

    The blonde spent the money on hairdressers, beauty products, and some beautiful clothes.
    She explained that she wanted to be as beautiful as possible for her man, so he could be proud to take her out, and enjoy her to the utmost.

    The redhead, spent the money on him.
    She explained that she only wished for him to be happy..

    The brunette, (Who was merchant banker) turned his $10K into $50K.
    She explained that she wanted her man to be able to enjoy her, and all the good things in life, without ever having to worry about money.

    HIM!He married the one with the biggest tits.

    Didn’t you hear? I told you he was a man.

  12. Marum | 6:58 am |

    Aking magandang babae always knew what I needed.

    And I sure as hell preferred it unwrapped.

  13. Big Fat Cat | 7:01 am |

    Ladies Beauty Centre? where can I find Miss Universe and Miss World?

  14. Marum | 7:04 am |

    I believe they can’t put Tampons in vending machines.

    They keep swelling up, and blocking the delivery chute.

  15. Pete | 8:14 am |

    Webmaster, that’s a pic from China.
    They don’t need whiskey.

    They got their own white lightnin’.
    It’s called Bai Jiu. (Lit: White Liquor…even though it’s crystal clear.)

    Gawsh did I wake up with a hangover from THAT stuff when I was in Beijing!

  16. Running Comment | 8:14 am |

    Needs, wants and desires.

  17. Pete | 8:31 am |

    @72nd at 4:28,

    You need a woman?
    In CHINA?

    Can you say “fish” and “barrel”???
    Chicks wanting $$ off westerners in exchange for a bang are EVERYWHERE.

    True story:
    My first time in China. Wife and I went to tour China in 2008.
    Stayed first in Beijing. Arrived as night was falling.
    Intrigued, I stepped out for a short walk to see the neighborhood as wife was in the hotel room showering off the long flight from the US.

    I didn’t get 50 feet outside the doors of the hotel lobby when a young lady appearing in her early 20’s approaches me and says “Good evening sir.” I replied “Good evening” and tried to keep walking. Girl says “Sir, perhaps you want a girl in your room? I am available.” So I replied in Mandarin “对不起,不行。现在我太太在我的房间里。”
    (I’m sorry, that won’t work. My wife’s in my room now.)

    She exclaimed “Oh! You speak China!” in Engrish.
    I replied “Not all of it.” in Engrish.

    She said, in English “Well, if you change your mind, here is my business card”.

    I said “谢谢你再见。” (Thanks, bye.) And I turned around, went back into the hotel, and tossed the card in the hotel lobby’s trash can.
    So much for my evening neighborhood sojourn.

  18. Long Tom | 8:59 am |

    @Pete: What a surprise! And I thought there was a shortage of women in China, due to the practice of parents wanting boys instead of girls.

    Unless she was imported from Korea or somewhere…

  19. Pete | 9:38 am |

    @Tom 8:59,

    There IS a shortage of women in China.
    Apparently it doesn’t stop some of them from trying to make a quick buck off a Laowai.

  20. Frank Burns | 1:47 pm |

    One rich young dumb nymphomaniac who owns a liquor store please.

  21. Droll not Troll | 5:04 pm |

    Men’s needs – all Maid in China.

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