Hey, you gotta do your part…

Hey, you gotta do your part…

posted on 4 Feb 2008 in Chinglish

And if you’re dead, please get to a hospital…

Photo courtesy of John V.
Found in Shanghai, China.

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Celeste
Guest
Celeste

Excuse me, is there a reward out for the safe return of myself to me?

anonymous
Guest

I think if I were stolen, I would just steal myself back. Hey, it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there……..

snopes
Guest
snopes

And if horse is out, please to be closing barn door.

Jeff
Guest
Jeff

Hey, but if you are sexually abused, don’t come crying to me!

me
Guest

And if the guy stole the police too?

iM CRAZY!!
Guest
iM CRAZY!!

good luck with that…oh! and tell me how it gos

mickeygreeneyes
Guest
mickeygreeneyes

I was already stolen twice! I KNOW what to do, for Gosh sakes!

Th4
Guest

If your phone is stolen, call your phone at once. Then call the police

FatKenney
Guest
FatKenney

Please have picture of you handy.

FatKenney
Guest
FatKenney

Police: “Hmmmm… This looks like an inside job.’

chickenman
Guest
chickenman

Oh snap! My phone’s stolen too!

chickenman
Guest
chickenman

Where is Liam Neeson when we need him?

Steve
Guest
Steve

Before to call, eating breakfast for long life. Each 18 dollar West Many Privates police to bringing.

John
Guest
John

Very good advice if they don’t steal your phone.

Dermot
Guest
Dermot

………. And they don’t even leave a f*cking number!

racist park
Guest
racist park

Call that “kidnapped” and you’ll be fine

loserbeep
Guest
loserbeep

This happens to me all the time, try my advice. The police are good for nothing call your local grocers, they’ll send you a bag of fresh herpes for 95 cents only, then douse the stealer with them.

liam1224
Guest
liam1224

and if your possessions are kidnapped…

Tom Sillers
Guest
Tom Sillers

Unless you’re in the witness protection program…

takatomon
Guest
takatomon

because possesion is kyu % ju of the law!
——————————————————————————————–
false alarm… i was just being borrowed. silly me
——————————————————————————————–
for if busy telephone, please to check number of correctness and to happily dial again
——————————————————————————————–
remember: when of people stealing, observe safety of others and to proper clean of mess. domo arigato. gozai mas
——————————————————————————————–
for cries of help please to be not disturb of others and use to respect of telephone only
——————————————————————————————–
if waiting for to be stolen, this is correct location
——————————————————————————————–
japan… we wife swap for keeps!

krypto
Guest
krypto

Let’s see, am I stolen or have I simply misplaced myself again…

Kat
Guest

But if you lose consciousness, please remember CPR.

Long Tom
Guest
Long Tom

I actually read in one of the “Dumb Criminals” books that a Chinese kidnap victim was taken to Canada and was told to call his family to tell them their ransom demands. The victim, speaking in Chinese (which the kidnappers didn’t know), told his family where he was, and the police were able to find him and the kidnappers soon after. So a Chinese “stolen person” really WAS able to contact the police, albeit indirectly.

Scorch855
Guest

And If cremated contact your local crematorium.

Jamyskis
Guest
Jamyskis

I’ve not been stolen, the kidnapper’s only borrowing me…

Gerson
Guest
Gerson

If you are kidnapped, please call morgue asap.

emr_nyc
Guest
emr_nyc

if you are stolen yourself, what about you ?

coffeebot
Guest
coffeebot

ME: I’m here to collect the reward.
SERGEANT: For what
ME: For the capture of my kidnapper.

weirdo
Guest
weirdo

If you see someone stolen, let the police call them.

Raj
Guest
Raj

U wanna b kidnapped?

LK
Guest
LK

You have to find yourself first, though.

Soso
Guest
Soso

Police officer:
“We’ll do our best to find you! But you gotta be patient!”

Zetzu
Guest
Zetzu

If you call the police please make sure you are not mister Stoler

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

– You have a right to remain stolen, Sir.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

But if you are stoned, police will call YOU

Myself
Guest

I should really lock my doors more often.

Myself
Guest

Last night burglars broke into my house. I looked all over and it appeared at first that nothing was stolen. But then, I realized – I didn’t see myself! I had been stolen!

Myself
Guest

They have such a problem with people getting stolen in Shanghai that it became a verb.

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