Table Lamp Instructions

Table Lamp Instructions

posted on 5 Apr 2010 in Chinglish, Instructions

Photo courtesy of Lance & Laura Ostman.
Instructions that came with table lamp (made in China).

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (344 votes, average: 4.55 out of 5)
Loading...
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
42 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
DieselDragon
10 years ago

So the product is completely safe when operated at 2,000 volts…

…As my sockets only supply 240v though, I fear I have to beware of safety! 🙂

Algernon
Algernon
10 years ago

The gift that will have your enemies glowing in the dark.

DieselDragon
10 years ago

Because of Monkeys…In the typing pool! 😀

Jay
Jay
10 years ago

This lamp is a cutie featute!

jjhitt
jjhitt
10 years ago

I’m really glad it has the beautiful to look at, but if doesn’t stop spurting technology, it’s going in the trash.

beechoak
beechoak
10 years ago

Sounds like a bunch of highhanded translation to me…!

Ralph Hamilton
Ralph Hamilton
10 years ago

2000 volts of highhanded shocks??
I know! It their latest Aversion Therapy trainer.

Thuggy D
Thuggy D
10 years ago

These gys, they nided more english lesonz.

Blaze
Blaze
10 years ago

This lamp is so awesome, I think I just spurted!

jjhitt
jjhitt
10 years ago

You’ve got to be careful with lampshades. Get the wrong one and you could end up perpetually deformed.

Xila31
Xila31
10 years ago

This lamp thinks its so high and mighty with its highhanded shocks.

tekleader
tekleader
10 years ago

Which orifice spurted?

Chris
Chris
10 years ago

Just follow the few simple instructions and everything will be fine.

Bill Posters
Bill Posters
10 years ago

I completely understand these instructions….
have I been reading engrish too long???

David
David
10 years ago

I had to get a refond for this prodrut because the aurface was sclatched.

Samuel
Samuel
10 years ago

it’s trying to tell me something, I can feel it…

Bill Sornson
Bill Sornson
10 years ago

See, now THAT is Engrish.

Nice!

Yugan Dali
10 years ago

What frightens me is that I have been teaching English so long that the instructions make sense to me.
@Bill Posters, I hear you! I hear you! and I feel your pain.

Cecily
Cecily
10 years ago

What scares me is that these “instructions” do not contain any actual instructions.

Tim S
Tim S
10 years ago

It’s obvious the designer used Lorem Ipsum when laying out the product sheet and forgot to replace it with the actual copy.

phoenixx
phoenixx
10 years ago

its sooooo pretty….dont go into the light!! bzzzzzzt…

Chuck
Chuck
10 years ago

Are the highhanded shocks worse than the underhanded sale people?

Lovintheengrish
Lovintheengrish
10 years ago

I’m glad of thi new feture which is made of the most advanced static electrcity……….OWWWWW!!!

Rylan Flautzinator
Rylan Flautzinator
10 years ago

Hey Yugan Dali, have you been teaching English or Engrish?

Terry
Terry
10 years ago

Very strange that their translator used the word FEATURE three times and spelled it three different ways, and PRODUCT is spelled correctly twice and incorrectly another time.

I suggest that we give the Chinese full access to our industrial and military secrets, with the requirement that this person translates all of the documentation. That should slow them down long enough for us to regain a foothold in international exports.

Recoil
10 years ago

My, this table lamp has some striking featutes.

Ptharien's Flame
Ptharien's Flame
10 years ago

Qualified metal material … is that like mystery meat?

Rusty
Rusty
10 years ago

It also has strong durable feautre of rustability! Wow, so it rusts but in a durable manner!

Lulu
Lulu
10 years ago

Thank heavens my lamp is succinct. Nothing worse than a rambling lighting fixture…

sinful
sinful
10 years ago

Summary:
buy at your own risk, plug it on with care!

DrLex
10 years ago

This lamp offers no protection vision! Make sure to wear shades at all times. Otherwise your eyesight will be deformed perpetually by the advanced static electricity.

Vandermark Swan
Vandermark Swan
10 years ago

Featute, feture, aurface, prodrut. How many words can someone “accidentally” misspell? and come on, “LEAKAGE OF ELECTRICITY!?” What the deuce?

kloo
10 years ago

you’ll wear your sunglasses at night

Brad
Brad
10 years ago

Easy for you to say!!!

MillenniumMan
MillenniumMan
10 years ago

If for watch looking into unoperated shading, standing like with high shocking purpetualy look-loss.

Has tearing of 2000 volts cord will burn carpets and house fire be occured.

Use seeing inclosure to keep lights on in face.

DrZos
DrZos
10 years ago

I hate the advanced static electricity on the door knobs…

Pengwyn
10 years ago

It may possess the beautiful to look at, but it lacks the understandment of clarities

Rilriia
Rilriia
10 years ago

I still want that lamp!

Beau
Beau
10 years ago

The last time my aurface spurted, I ended up in the emergency room….

numagirl22
numagirl22
9 years ago

nothing worse than perpetual deformity!

j s
j s
8 years ago

What a way to tell people that the lamp was hi-pot tested.

stellaruniverse
stellaruniverse
5 years ago

Now with advanced static electricity! Now you much electrocuted!

Home | Brog | Store | Massage Board | Advertise | Contact Us | Disclaimer

© 1999 - 2020 Engrish.com. All rights reserved.
42
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x