Fruit/Vegetable Peeler Package Instructions (contains 4 letter word)

Fruit/Vegetable Peeler Package Instructions (contains 4 letter word)

posted on 8 Nov 2010 in Chinglish, Instructions

Who knew peeling vegetables was so complicated?


Photo courtesy of Meghan Dโ€™Mello.
Found in Chinese discount store in India.
Image of back of a fruit/vegetable peeler package.

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Eduard
Eduard
9 years ago

So, in excrescent circumstances, when the finger does not want to touch, the product transforms and if used from behind, the bottom is good to please if usage with exactitude!
Oh, and don’t forget to send greeting after discarding the package!
๐Ÿ˜€

Lana
Lana
9 years ago

Have a meal first and don’t forget to wash the behind afterwards!:D

DrLex
DrLex
9 years ago

Divided by the vegetable melons, not to be confused with the meaty melons.

DrZos
DrZos
9 years ago

I am the function peeler and I approve this message.

Eduard
Eduard
9 years ago

If they put it THIS way, peeling IS a hazardous habit! Not to mention greasy, messy, slippery, confusing, complex, risky, bloody, filthy, sexually-implicit and perverse, but pleasant, nevertheless!

faulty wiring
faulty wiring
9 years ago

Got it. Now all I need is a carrot & some lubricant

Algernon
Algernon
9 years ago

What the f@#jk mow the wound finger!

faulty wiring
faulty wiring
9 years ago

‘911, what is your emergency?’
‘I’ve just mowed myself with our new vegetable slicer’
‘Hmm, this is a heavy circumstance. You didn’t use it on an empty stomach did you?’
‘Yes ma’am’.
‘You must send a greeting immediately, but don’t discard the handles. Were next to fiery, or cutting vegetable melons?’
‘I was, actually’
‘Oh God! Has the excrescence started? ‘
‘Well, now that you mention it…’
‘How old are you son?’
‘Fourteen.’
‘Right. I’m dispatching a vehicle to mete out some exactitude on your bottom young man. Maybe next time you’ll remember to read the instructions’

Eduard
Eduard
9 years ago

I’d better stick to peeling the labels off my bottles of Bud.

beechoak
beechoak
9 years ago

No better place to cane the child than the place!

jjhitt
jjhitt
9 years ago

I’m not sure, but I think the last two items sound like a suicide note.

Eccekio
Eccekio
9 years ago

Proof of age is required before allowing instructions to be read.

jjhitt
jjhitt
9 years ago

Washing and wiping one’s behind IS important.

Sam
Sam
9 years ago

It slices! It dices! It … does what now?!??

jjhitt
jjhitt
9 years ago

I’ll have the triple bacon cheeseburger. I got a whole mess of vegetables I need to peel.

jjhitt
jjhitt
9 years ago

(because of monkeys)

jjhitt
jjhitt
9 years ago

I do not provide legal advice and as the law differs in each legal jurisdiction and may be interpreted or applied differently depending on your location or situation, you should consult with a lawyer for legal advice.

HOWEVER, I can tell you that sex acts involving children and razor blades is going to get you deep in big trouble.

Jellychop
Jellychop
9 years ago

How do you peel a function?

SF
SF
9 years ago

Van Gogh bought one, once.

FatKenney
FatKenney
9 years ago

Great for peeling potatoes, shredding carrots, and extracting confessions.

FatKenney
FatKenney
9 years ago

This product endorsed by Rachael Ray, Gordon Ramsay, and Grand Inquisitor Torquemada.

DrLex
DrLex
9 years ago

Will it peel? That is the question.

jjhitt
jjhitt
9 years ago

On my planet, melons have rinds, not peels.

demondude777
demondude777
9 years ago

Hello company of razer mow fingers of vegetable peeler!

Sending greetings after discarding pack. Read instruction on slicing of fingers and mow children. Decided to eat vegetables in raw of the form after reading warning.

Thank you for dangerous slicer! Have a day that is joyful, and give my best to the childs!

Josh
Josh
9 years ago

I don’t know where to begin with this one………………………..

Eccekio
Eccekio
9 years ago

If I, for some strange reason wished to have intercourse with a behind, my minimum requirements would definitely be, that it be well washed and wiped first.

EffEff
EffEff
9 years ago

“Under the heavy circumstance in burthen please avoid usage, the in order to prevent causes the product transforms.”

Cool! Does that mean it turns into a giant robot!

selevi
selevi
9 years ago

Oh! Ahahahaha … I do not really know why … ruined many such words are not.

selevi
selevi
9 years ago

@faulty wiring: it might be interesting having your comment run through the Engrish.com method. ๐Ÿ˜€ ‘911, what is your emergency?’ ‘I have cut myself just in our new vegetable slicer’ ‘Well, this is a serious situation. Do not use it on an empty stomach you did? ‘ ‘Yes, madam.’ ‘You must not destroy the process to send a greeting immediately. Such as burning, cutting vegetables or melons or the next? ‘ ‘I was actually ‘ [Oh my God! Are you starting something extra? ‘ ‘Well, now you are speaking of that … ‘You are old are you son? ‘ ‘Fourteen’… Read more »

faulty wiring
faulty wiring
9 years ago

@selevi:

much thank. me speak engrish now very goodly. me teacher at my country for the engrish. happy friend!

Jeff
Jeff
9 years ago

Well, it sure is more pleasant if you wash first, then “use” from behind…

my guitar wants to kill your mama
my guitar wants to kill your mama
9 years ago

one word “exactitude”

Carlos
Carlos
9 years ago

“The usage is good to please wash clearly to wipe to **** behind”
That’s what she said.
It’s not what I said, though. I find the usage to be better if the behind a little dirty when I **** it.

mike
mike
9 years ago

And people thought that Yoda talked funny….

Wile E. Coyote Super Genius

This is either the Unabomber’s manifesto or component stereo instructions.

Meathead
9 years ago

It washes the peel of blade or else the hose it gets.

liam1224
liam1224
9 years ago

but after I have a meal I’m not hungry…

garudamon11
garudamon11
9 years ago

Translation: dont cut your self

Ruuku
Ruuku
9 years ago

I’m getting tired of sending greetings cards every time I need to peel something

DragonLady
DragonLady
9 years ago

I’ve heard that Lady Thatcher keeps one of these peelers in each & every one of her handbags. She had the instructions decoded for her personal usage & is very satisfied with the product.

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