Perhibition

Perhibition

posted on 15 Nov 2010 in Chinglish

The 12 Engrish commandments…

Photo from a private school in
Taiwan for their ‘pastoral area’.
Originally posted 2004.8.23

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (359 votes, average: 4.68 out of 5)
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KillerDan3000
KillerDan3000
12 years ago

“Do not follow the instruction on using these facility.” ??? You ask and I obey oh masterful engrish sign. I am off to get naked, misbehave, litter, swim, take a shower, fish, hang my whites to dry, be tight (whatever the heck that is supposed to mean), scream, pick flowers, step on the grass, break your urinals to bits, bring in guns and knives for all of the students, put up bulletins all over the building, drive my car through the wall, and ride my bike through the halls. Anything else I shouldn’t obey?

Bob*
Bob*
10 years ago

Not follow the instructions?! but I have to!

Gwydion Williams
Gwydion Williams
10 years ago

Do not litter the trash around, and avoid unbehaviours

Tim S
Tim S
10 years ago

I’m glad I read through the whole list before I started obeying them!

Max
Max
10 years ago

KillerDan,

Of course you should put up bulletins but I think the rule that you must disobey also anticipates the unbehavior of using spray paint.

Where I come from “to be tight” is to be in a thoroughly drunken state.

Tong
Tong
10 years ago

Wow, Kangqiao bilingual school. I guess, Chinese and Engrish.

1. Don not be unbehaviours – so I have to do something.
2. Don not liter the trash – because trash here is clean and precious
5. Do not tight here – must spend a lot of money
11. Do not follow the instruction on… – Are you telling me, I just wasted 5 minutes reading stupid rules that I don’t need to follow?!!!!

alexmagnus
alexmagnus
10 years ago

Well, it says following things are “perhibited”. So it’s a double negative – f.x. you should *not not* walk around naked. And not not follow instructions :). But what the heck are “other school limited items” and why are they “perhibited”?

jjhitt
jjhitt
10 years ago

Be-Naked. It’s the Unbehavior.

jjhitt
jjhitt
10 years ago

You have been found not guilty of not breaking rule 11.

Eccekio
Eccekio
10 years ago

At last. A totally redundant set of instructions.

mickeygreeneyes
mickeygreeneyes
10 years ago

Oh, hell! What am I going to do with my dangerous stuff? Like this roll of caps from my Roy Rogers cap pistol I’ve had since I was six?

mickeygreeneyes
mickeygreeneyes
10 years ago

Muddah, faddah, kindly disregard this lettuh!

phoenixx
phoenixx
10 years ago

mom!mom! i have to fertilize the flowers!! i didnt go at home

d17nk
d17nk
10 years ago

Do not be-naked, and be tight here. Those are the noisy unbehavior.

Morgan le Fay
Morgan le Fay
10 years ago

This reminds me of those trick quizzes often given to school children to test whether they read instructions. The instructions say “read through the entire list before answering any of the questions,” and then the last item on the list says “do not answer any of the above questions.” In this case, if you don’t read through the entire list you don’t realize that following the instructions is prohibited.

xila31
xila31
10 years ago

If one of the rules is to not follow the rules, then even the rebels will be following the rules! Mwahaha!

Snufkin
Snufkin
10 years ago

“I’m sorry sir, but I’m going to have to write you a ticket.”

“What? What for?”

“You broke Rule 11.”

“But that’s ridiculous! I didn’t follow a single instrnction, just like the rule says!”

“Yes sir, that’s right. By failing to follow instrnctions, you obeyed Rule 11. Which is clearly a violation of Rule 11. You also violated the other 11 rules, so I’m going to have to write you tickets for those as well…”

coffeebot
coffeebot
10 years ago

Do not tight? Loose women welcome!

Classic Steve
10 years ago

Sign writers, do not be-stupid.

Explorer09
Explorer09
10 years ago

Look! This sign is in a bilingual school in Taiwan.

Does this mean they teach their students Chinglish and Chinese (yep, it’s ‘bilingual’)? as well as NOT following instructions on using facilities?

kyle vincent
kyle vincent
10 years ago

I hope all tax laws have the same provision as “Rule 11”

Yugan Dali
10 years ago

Kangchiao is a super-expensive, super-snob bilingual private school ~ they are so exclusive that they have even developed their own dialect of Chinglish!

Johnny Cache
10 years ago

Do not follow the instruction on using these facility? But if I follow that instruction, I’m not following the instructions. But THAT means that I AM following the instructions.But *THAT* means that I’m not! But….

Error! Error! Please explain…. (necklace glows, freezes in place.)

Carlos
Carlos
10 years ago

That’s almost it. If one of the instructions is to not follow instructions, then it negates itself. That is, ignoring the other instructions is still following the one instruction, which breaks that instruction itself. It creates a logical loop similar to “I am lying.”

“Do not bring dangerous stuff.” I love the simplicity of that! We should adopt that.

“Other school regulations…” Does that mean that any school regulations and limitations other than the ones on that sign are prohibited?

“Do not tight here.” I *really* want to know what the hell that means.

Pete
Pete
10 years ago

““Do not tight here.” I *really* want to know what the hell that means.”

Translation: Hand the cash over, laowai.”

Alkaline
Alkaline
10 years ago

“Do not tight here”= Don’t disturb public order. Like picking up a fight or something.

Bridget
10 years ago

I am unbehavior while I’m typing this 🙂 …………….

tekleader
tekleader
10 years ago

Being naked – the Unbehavior!™

TLA
TLA
10 years ago

I think that there had been kung fu tighting going on. And the premise had started to run out of spandex.

Wile E. Coyote Super Genius

You should have told me about Rule #11 before I broke the other facility.

repetitious
repetitious
10 years ago

I take it smorking’s allowed?

英会話 神戸 三宮

I get most of them but,
Do not tight here.

?!?!

my guitar wants to kill your mama
my guitar wants to kill your mama
10 years ago

i know there’s a song in this one… somwhere’s, I’m finding it hard to think strait after reading it tho!

Chudz
Chudz
9 years ago

#11 is a paradox. If you don’t follow the instructions, then you’re following instruction #11 in which case you would, in fact, be breaking rule #11 and therefore would be obeying #11 and, well.. you see where I’m going?

Myself
5 years ago

I wonder why they had to specifically call out being-naked as an unbehavior, and put it at the top of the list where everyone would see it! Did they have a problem with people being-naked in their Pastrol Education Area before they put up this sign?

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