Tower Rules

Tower Rules

posted on 28 Mar 2011 in Chinglish

Sorry, that was my effluvium…


Photo courtesy of Nick Simmons.
Rules found at Oriental Pearl Television Tower in Shanghai, China.

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Samuel RoblesSeventy2rd o clockdalahästBear or bustYugan Dali Recent comment authors
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FatKenney
Guest
FatKenney

Being drunk and insane is permissible as long as you look presentable? I guess Charlie Sheen’s all set then.

krysto4
Guest
krysto4

It’s so hard to walk through all this baleful biology…

SF
Guest
SF

Does a mother-in-law qualify as baleful biology?

FatKenney
Guest
FatKenney

I love the smell of effluvium in the morning.

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

It all makes sense to me except for the picture of a can of Lemon Pledge.
Is dusting forbidden in the Tower?

FatKenney
Guest
FatKenney

“I’m sorry, sir. You’ll have to leave your sword with the security officer at the front desk. You can pick it up on your way out.”

Algernon
Guest
Algernon

I’ll rap myself in plastic then before entering

coffeebot
Guest
coffeebot

Excuse me, where’s the cubage of liquid machine? My liquid article won’t accept examination without it.

Salome
Guest
Salome

We’re having bangers and match tonight, followed by baleful biology in an effort to clear the pollution from our inner environment and produce much cubage of peculiarly smelling effluvium.

DrZos
Guest
DrZos

My germs don’t bite. Can I enter now?

Jellychop
Guest
Jellychop

Look closely at the photos.
I can see prohibiting “articles which can destroy and pollute the inner environment”, but why single out Lemon Pledge?

DrZos
Guest
DrZos

No interlopers? Oh well… Aunt Bessie, you have to wait here, we’ll pick you up on our way out.

DrZos
Guest
DrZos

OK, guys! Who cut the effluvium???

Chuck
Guest
Chuck

Sauron says ” No Effluvium in the Tower ! “

Chris
Guest
Chris

Drunk, insane, and not properly dressed is no way to go through life, son…

Big Fat Cat
Guest

Spider Man not allowed to enter. Spider Man climbs wall of Tower to top

Zizzybalooba
Guest
Zizzybalooba

Sounds like the rules for the Tower of London.

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

At they stopped discriminating against sufferers of the crazy disease.

demondude777
Guest
demondude777

So lets see…tinder, restrictive blade, electric appliance……well, looks like my sub-machine gun is clear to go in with me.

But honey, please leave the microwave in the car.

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

Tower CLOSED: An Insane and not properly dressed person called in a banger threat. Tower must be checked by the Exploder Squad.

Eccekio
Guest
Eccekio

Och laddie! Can I noo bring in ma Haggis.

kshea
Guest
kshea

Many are the people who have succumbed to disease caused by baleful biology.

Bridget
Guest

Ooooohh, MOM, can we pleeeze visit the epidemic area? ……What if I promise to leave my sword in the car???

A Non-Y Mouse
Guest
A Non-Y Mouse

Furries who are on the wagon can even skip the line.

coffeebot
Guest
coffeebot

Back in the day we were only casually punished.

Darth Na'vi
Guest
Darth Na'vi

That’s a Tower of Rules.

Darth Na'vi
Guest
Darth Na'vi

Hey, wait a minute. With rule #1, I can walk in if I am properly dressed, drunk, AND insane! Awesome. On my way.

EffEff
Guest
EffEff

May I bring my Rubik’s Cubage?

iLock
Guest
iLock

You are baleful biology! Get out!
Ah, geez.. sorry..

iLock
Guest
iLock

“Thank you for your understanding” …
I never said I understood you… and so on

iLock
Guest
iLock

Wow, I actually learnt a new proper English word on here: Interloper!

Dania
Guest
Dania

AH, so that’s where the snake who escaped the Bronx zoo is hanging out. Sneaky snake!

Josh
Guest
Josh

How dare you bring your religion into the tower!

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

It means that us, The Knights Who Say ‘Ni’! may enter the Tower with … the HERRING!!!!!

kyle vincent
Guest
kyle vincent

You are under arrest, seriously,

Yugan Dali
Guest

We will do our best to provide security for you. Comprehensible English? Sorry, not our game.

Bear or bust
Guest
Bear or bust

What if the interloper had a sword…

dalahäst
Guest
dalahäst

You’ve posted what appears to be a past incarnation of the sign a few years ago, at https://www.engrish.com/2009/11/entering-the-tower/ . I’m wondering now if both signs still exist, or this one replaced the old one. Evidently, the “baleful biology” phrase still persists.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

In my opinion, this is more like ‘Notes for NOT entering the Tower’.

Samuel Robles
Guest

“So… do you guys have banger-check or what?”

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