I have a good feeling about this life jacket

I have a good feeling about this life jacket

posted on 27 Sep 2012 in Chinglish

Photo courtesy of Andrew Taylor.
 Vibrating condom package found in China.

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (224 votes, average: 4.71 out of 5)
Loading...
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
56 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Mick
Mick
8 years ago

Wow, that’s one sexy Life Jacket you’re wearing!

Jonnytbone
Jonnytbone
8 years ago

I’ll take 10.

Mick
Mick
8 years ago

I’d hate to have this around my neck.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
8 years ago

After reading this, my sensa is severely unprecedentedented.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

Hmm, life jacket, wrap AND vibrator… Haven’t tried that yet.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
8 years ago

It takes out the product in the packing box, or else it gets hosed again.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

Note to intimate bird: I’m directexcited G, but it crisply crisply itches too much!

JohnZ
JohnZ
8 years ago

That intimate bird looks a bit nervous and obsessed with vibration. Probably Woody Woodpecker.

Algernon
Algernon
8 years ago

Be sex be vibrator be common or voluntary

SF
SF
8 years ago

The DIY use doesn’t require any vibrating life-jacket.

faulty wiring
faulty wiring
8 years ago

Dear Goodbinjiayi Hotel Thing Ltd,

I hereby return my purchase to you and respectfully request a full refund of it’s cost. Despite applying the link wrap to my genital root and angling it as directed, my attempts to make intimate acquaintance with a bird failed instantly and my sex life remains distinctly deficient in fervour. The only unprecedented sensations after 90 minutes of crisply crisply itch were the intense pain of deep tissue damage and sting of gravel rash. Despite this I remain optimistic about the DIY potential of your expanded range of abrasive, high voltage rubber items.

Yours etc…

Marum
Marum
8 years ago

A bird in the hand, is worth two in the bush.

jjhitt
jjhitt
8 years ago

One can never have enough crispness.

mickeygreeneyes
mickeygreeneyes
8 years ago

What the f—-? You can’t make this stuff up.

pijo
pijo
8 years ago

Mm, how do you use it DIY style?

Marum
Marum
8 years ago

Look. Im a male. How or where am I supposed to use this thing?

jjhitt
jjhitt
8 years ago

One in the bush is worth two in the intimate bird.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

I’ll just stick to my own stick, thank you so much.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

Vibrator and life jacket must be OK, but I don’t understand all this unprecedentedentedunpleasant confusion with wraps.

PeeBee
PeeBee
8 years ago

This is the original model. The other one is extra crisply.

Marum
Marum
8 years ago

Does the vibrating life-jacket ensure that you have an orgasm as you drown?

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

@ Marum: Unfortunately it doesn’t. Because if you intend to use it as a life jacket, you’ll soon realize it’s several sizes too small.

Pectolatra
Pectolatra
8 years ago

It vibrates for 45 – 90 minutes?!? 😯
I want testimonies of this unprecedentedpleasant sensation!!!

Chuck
Chuck
8 years ago

Coming up next on HGTV, the previously banned episode of “Disaster DIY”.

KellogGold
KellogGold
8 years ago

Crisply crisply itches? This condom may be less than 99.4% effective.

coffeebot
8 years ago

Not intended as a floatation device

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
8 years ago

If your intimate bird gets a directexcited G from this, you’re doing it right.

A Non-Y Mouse
A Non-Y Mouse
8 years ago

Hmmm… I have to see if I can get that DIY channel added to my cable package.

BFS
BFS
8 years ago

Ah forget it, I’ll just use my hand instead.

TheUnknown
TheUnknown
8 years ago

Doesn’t China have a law to prevent this much engrish?

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

Perfectly simple: if it’s a hotel thing, it must be confused.

Sparky
Sparky
8 years ago

Man overboard!

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
8 years ago

This is way to complicated. I’m going to go join a monastery.

Tommy
Tommy
8 years ago

That Titanic movie needed more of these and less of those.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
8 years ago

Do not get the vibration salient point backward or you may never walk again!

Biff the Understudy
Biff the Understudy
8 years ago

Did we mention crisply?

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
8 years ago

Existence of God is explained in a very similar way.

Steven
Steven
8 years ago

I like DIY projects. so they sell this at Home Depot? =P

jjhitt
jjhitt
8 years ago

“Voluntarily the DIY use” — you’re never too old to learn yet another euphemism for masturbation.

jjhitt
jjhitt
8 years ago

Is that a salient point forward in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?

jjhitt
jjhitt
8 years ago

Hotel Thing Limited Company — “We’ll leave the vibrator on for you.”

Biff the Understudy
Biff the Understudy
8 years ago

@jjhitt: “We’ll leave the vibrator on for you.”

I so want to hear Tom Bodette saying that!

Biff the Understudy
Biff the Understudy
8 years ago

Bodette Bodett. Sorry Tom.

GwydionM
GwydionM
8 years ago

Intimate Birds, an Adult version of Angry Birds

Lora
Lora
8 years ago

Whoever wrote this must have been using the vibrator.

jjhitt
jjhitt
8 years ago

Fifty Shades Of Life Jacket

DragonLady
DragonLady
8 years ago

Good, good, good, good vibrations!

Marum
Marum
8 years ago

I will never order in French again.

combat_rock
combat_rock
8 years ago

“Enter to the male genitals root”? Sounds painful.

Kirsty
8 years ago

Ummm… shouldn’t this be in adult Engrish?

Home | Brog | Store | Massage Board | Advertise | Contact Us | Disclaimer

© 1999 - 2020 Engrish.com. All rights reserved.
56
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x