Keep lil’ stinker safe

Unless they’re rotten children

It’s really so simple:

– take out the screw
– push upward
– push downward
– on-off, up-down

Repeat these steps until no movement available

If they’re under 3 they certainly are.

I want money back – my Hazard choked to death!

The motion sensor can also pick up the sound and odour of pass by, apparently..

This actually led to the first incidence of Homer Simpson throttling Bart.

If children under 3 can’t have small farts, who the heck can?

Is there a choking hazard for old farts?

The interesting Fart is belong to me!

Thank God I’m an old fart so don’t have to worry about this.

A camera that can even photograph small farts? Shut up and take my money!!

The motion sensor can pick up the movement of pass gas.

Wait, this methane detector is a choking hazard on itself? What’s the point?

“O.K. boy! Let ‘er rip!”

Pull tiny finger gently.

For larger farts, push upward and pull out the rotten child.

No matter how small, farts are serious business…

Hmmm….Most of us are more likely to choke on large farts.

Safety alert: Only for use on stomach full of baked beans and onions.

Using push-up bra to take out the screw might help

Large farts sold separately.

The motion sensor is completely silent…… but deadly.

Warning: Do not install in enclosed places or near sources of combustion.

Make sure to put batteries in the top. The bottom is where the small farts come out.

‘I’m Lil Shit’
‘And I’m Lil F*cker’
‘And we approved this message.’

it sounds it silently or else it skips the beans again

Mount the camera, but not in front of the children

With this around, the children will never get gas again.