Zontary Shoes

Zontary Shoes

posted on 24 Jul 2013 in Clothing

Photo courtesy of Tony S.

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Sue JohnsonChucktownSum Ting WongEffEffMr. Wrong Recent comment authors
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algernon
Guest
algernon

Sounds more like sex

algernon
Guest
algernon

So odor eaters aren’t necessary then

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

Poor, poor, Mike. Killed by shoes from space.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

Self-recording shoes

Jonnytbone
Guest
Jonnytbone

Congratulations for having read the longest sentence on record.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

The first sentence is too short.

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

If Zontary thinks that having Mike capsules in his interior is the best possible sensation…. well…. that sure tells us a lot about Zontary.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

The incorporation of mike capsules allows you to hear the sole music.

SF
Guest
SF

I’m Mike and I don’t approve this message.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

Hey Zontary, let’s Mike!

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

@Jonnytbone: Now, find the verb.

MICKEYGREENEYES
Guest
MICKEYGREENEYES

I haven’t seen a sentence this long since my last hitch in the slammer.

MICKEYGREENEYES
Guest
MICKEYGREENEYES

Okay, you clowns! Is this Star Wars, Star Trek or Dr. Who? Come on, now!

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Bubbles in his interior followed by natural aromas. There’s no way insoles are gonna help that situation!

DrLex
Guest
DrLex

Buy a Zontary shoe with 5 mike capsules and you’ll get a free 5.1 surround installation so you can hear yourself walk in 3D.

DrLex
Guest
DrLex

Mike capsules in someone’s interior to provide the best possible sensation. Ah, the things proctologists have to deal with these days.

Frank Burns
Guest
Frank Burns

I’m gonna stick to my Converse high tops. They’re not so long winded.

WorrierPrincess
Guest
WorrierPrincess

Moisturizing cosmetics will ooze out of your perforations with every step.

pasdrole
Guest
pasdrole

Ewww!

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

Walking in mike shoes

♫♪♪
Now I’m not looking for congratulation
Recordings of the things I do
But before you come to any illusions
Try walking in mike shoes
Try walking in mike shoes

You’ll stumble in Mike’s footsteps
Keep the same recordings I kept
If you try walking in mike shoes
If you try walking in mike shoes…

…Try walking in Nike shoes!
♫♪

Sparky
Guest
Sparky

Don’t trust Zontary…sounds too contrary.

iLock
Guest
iLock

I can’t trust in Zontary until I know that mike is ok.

iLock
Guest
iLock

I’m against testing on mike, and I definitely wouldn’t wear mike leather!!

iLock
Guest
iLock

“Open the capsule doors please, Zontary”

“I’m sorry mike, I’m afraid I can’t do that….you and frank
were trying to disconnect me…. I could see your perforation move”

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

Well, that’s shoe business…

Mark
Guest
Mark

‘unfortunately, due to the recent downturn in the far East economies, we are only aloud to provide one full stop per advert’.

A Non-Y Mouse
Guest
A Non-Y Mouse

I’m guessing these are Air Jordan knock-offs.

Biff the Understudy
Guest
Biff the Understudy

@ MICKEYGREENEYES: Zontary is obviously a reference to the Sontaran Empire, so Dr. Who it is.

“I hope someday to meet you in glory of battle where I will crush the life from your worthless human form. Try and get some rest.”

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

– Mommy, Daddy is talking to his shoes!

Biff the Understudy
Guest
Biff the Understudy

Sheesh, the NSA even has hidden microphones in my shoes?

miamier
Guest
miamier

Run-on sentences rock! Who needs a period?!

Marum
Guest
Marum

Did he say insole or a—hole?

Marum
Guest
Marum

Zontary = The art of writing entirely without punctuation. (VB: zonted)

Classic Steve
Guest

Zontary should hire the Micro Machine Man for their TV ads.

szk
Guest
szk

@Seventy2rd o clock
One of the few cases where I actually know what song that it is in reference to 😉

Chuck
Guest
Chuck

…and the money we save on punctuation is passed on to you !

Marum
Guest
Marum

Actually. At the cost of signwriting nowadays, it may be cheaper not to put in punctuation. I will have to look into it.

Dollars vs readability.

Marum
Guest
Marum

Just do it Mike /

RT
Guest
RT

i’m a man living on the edge; i don’t write sentences with commas, colons or semicolons

Marum
Guest
Marum

On the edge of incomprehensibility obviously.

Fredly
Guest
Fredly

So, you’re telling me that the insoles are? Yeeeeeahh!

A Non-Y Mouse
Guest
A Non-Y Mouse

It puts the lotion on its feet…

Mr. Wrong
Guest
Mr. Wrong

The 2013 winner of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest.

EffEff
Guest
EffEff

The sentence wore running shoes.

Sum Ting Wong
Guest
Sum Ting Wong

I’m guessing the writer deserves some kudos on contriving the longest English sentence ever

Chucktown
Guest

Mike also available for parties in liquid form

Sue Johnson
Guest
Sue Johnson

My shoes, a soft and agreeable perfume….

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