Zontary Shoes

Zontary Shoes

posted on 24 Jul 2013 in Clothing

Photo courtesy of Tony S.

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algernon
algernon
7 years ago

Sounds more like sex

algernon
algernon
7 years ago

So odor eaters aren’t necessary then

jjhitt
jjhitt
7 years ago

Poor, poor, Mike. Killed by shoes from space.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
7 years ago

Self-recording shoes

Jonnytbone
Jonnytbone
7 years ago

Congratulations for having read the longest sentence on record.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
7 years ago

The first sentence is too short.

jjhitt
jjhitt
7 years ago

If Zontary thinks that having Mike capsules in his interior is the best possible sensation…. well…. that sure tells us a lot about Zontary.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
7 years ago

The incorporation of mike capsules allows you to hear the sole music.

SF
SF
7 years ago

I’m Mike and I don’t approve this message.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
7 years ago

Hey Zontary, let’s Mike!

jjhitt
jjhitt
7 years ago

@Jonnytbone: Now, find the verb.

MICKEYGREENEYES
MICKEYGREENEYES
7 years ago

I haven’t seen a sentence this long since my last hitch in the slammer.

MICKEYGREENEYES
MICKEYGREENEYES
7 years ago

Okay, you clowns! Is this Star Wars, Star Trek or Dr. Who? Come on, now!

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
7 years ago

Bubbles in his interior followed by natural aromas. There’s no way insoles are gonna help that situation!

DrLex
DrLex
7 years ago

Buy a Zontary shoe with 5 mike capsules and you’ll get a free 5.1 surround installation so you can hear yourself walk in 3D.

DrLex
DrLex
7 years ago

Mike capsules in someone’s interior to provide the best possible sensation. Ah, the things proctologists have to deal with these days.

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
7 years ago

I’m gonna stick to my Converse high tops. They’re not so long winded.

WorrierPrincess
WorrierPrincess
7 years ago

Moisturizing cosmetics will ooze out of your perforations with every step.

pasdrole
pasdrole
7 years ago

Ewww!

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
7 years ago

Walking in mike shoes

♫♪♪
Now I’m not looking for congratulation
Recordings of the things I do
But before you come to any illusions
Try walking in mike shoes
Try walking in mike shoes

You’ll stumble in Mike’s footsteps
Keep the same recordings I kept
If you try walking in mike shoes
If you try walking in mike shoes…

…Try walking in Nike shoes!
♫♪

Sparky
Sparky
7 years ago

Don’t trust Zontary…sounds too contrary.

iLock
iLock
7 years ago

I can’t trust in Zontary until I know that mike is ok.

iLock
iLock
7 years ago

I’m against testing on mike, and I definitely wouldn’t wear mike leather!!

iLock
iLock
7 years ago

“Open the capsule doors please, Zontary”

“I’m sorry mike, I’m afraid I can’t do that….you and frank
were trying to disconnect me…. I could see your perforation move”

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
7 years ago

Well, that’s shoe business…

Mark
Mark
7 years ago

‘unfortunately, due to the recent downturn in the far East economies, we are only aloud to provide one full stop per advert’.

A Non-Y Mouse
A Non-Y Mouse
7 years ago

I’m guessing these are Air Jordan knock-offs.

Biff the Understudy
Biff the Understudy
7 years ago

@ MICKEYGREENEYES: Zontary is obviously a reference to the Sontaran Empire, so Dr. Who it is.

“I hope someday to meet you in glory of battle where I will crush the life from your worthless human form. Try and get some rest.”

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
7 years ago

– Mommy, Daddy is talking to his shoes!

Biff the Understudy
Biff the Understudy
7 years ago

Sheesh, the NSA even has hidden microphones in my shoes?

miamier
miamier
7 years ago

Run-on sentences rock! Who needs a period?!

Marum
Marum
7 years ago

Did he say insole or a—hole?

Marum
Marum
7 years ago

Zontary = The art of writing entirely without punctuation. (VB: zonted)

Classic Steve
7 years ago

Zontary should hire the Micro Machine Man for their TV ads.

szk
szk
7 years ago

@Seventy2rd o clock
One of the few cases where I actually know what song that it is in reference to 😉

Chuck
Chuck
7 years ago

…and the money we save on punctuation is passed on to you !

Marum
Marum
7 years ago

Actually. At the cost of signwriting nowadays, it may be cheaper not to put in punctuation. I will have to look into it.

Dollars vs readability.

Marum
Marum
7 years ago

Just do it Mike /

RT
RT
7 years ago

i’m a man living on the edge; i don’t write sentences with commas, colons or semicolons

Marum
Marum
7 years ago

On the edge of incomprehensibility obviously.

Fredly
Fredly
7 years ago

So, you’re telling me that the insoles are? Yeeeeeahh!

A Non-Y Mouse
A Non-Y Mouse
7 years ago

It puts the lotion on its feet…

Mr. Wrong
Mr. Wrong
7 years ago

The 2013 winner of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest.

EffEff
EffEff
7 years ago

The sentence wore running shoes.

Sum Ting Wong
Sum Ting Wong
7 years ago

I’m guessing the writer deserves some kudos on contriving the longest English sentence ever

Chucktown
6 years ago

Mike also available for parties in liquid form

Sue Johnson
Sue Johnson
5 years ago

My shoes, a soft and agreeable perfume….

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