Hold on to your psychopaths

Hold on to your psychopaths

posted on 4 Jun 2014 in Chinglish, Instructions

Photo courtesy of Jonathan Goodchild.
Spotted in China. 

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jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

Hey! Morons have rights too!

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

♫ Who’s the cat that won’t cop out
When there’s treads all about
(Shaft!)
Right on ♫

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

d) The Spermen.

Big Fat Cat
Guest
Big Fat Cat

Attention Morons and Psychopaths: If you don’t have anyone to accompany you, you can go to the admin office on G/F to hire one during your pleasant trip in the elevator.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

NOTE: Not following, blind, pregnant hypertensive psychopaths suffering morons under 7 must not be accompanied.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

– Mommy! I see playing in the car door!

algernon
Guest
algernon

Well just be careful of the morons and psycopaths

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

When morons and psychopaths are following people, it’s time to start worrying!

algernon
Guest
algernon

Morons are people too.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

No crossing the safety window, it isn’t Catholic.

Peter
Guest
Peter

Amalgamated Association of Morons, Local 6-7/8!

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

A moron and a psychopath walked into an elevator. The elevator driver asked “Are you two together?” The psychopath replied “No, we’re crazy, we just want to accompany each other”.

DrLex
Guest
DrLex

Is “The Blind, the Pregnant, the Moron and the Psychopath” one of Sergio Leone’s lesser-known films?

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Naturally, rule 6 also applies to people who want to get pregnant in the elevator.

Stopchicks
Guest
Stopchicks

Luckily for me, I’m just an idiot.

jjhitt
Guest
jjhitt

A pregnant woman, a blind guy, a moron and a psychopath got on an elevator together. The blind guy said “It’s OK, were going as far as the next joke.”

Frank Burns
Guest
Frank Burns

Hi! I’m a psychopath. Want to go for a ride on the elevator with me?

GwydionM
Guest

Oh give me a car door
In the spirit of Mordor
Where the moron and psychopath play
(To tune of “where the buffalo roam, and accompanied with jumping.)

Sparky
Guest
Sparky

Moron this later.

Dervrak
Guest
Dervrak

So does that mean if you are a blind, pregnant, moronic psychopath, who suffers from heart disease and hypertension, you need to be accompanied by a minimum of six people?

A Non-Y Mouse
Guest
A Non-Y Mouse

Another variation on the fox, goat, and grain crossing the river puzzle.

Marum
Guest
Marum

Why can’t my local member ride in the lift with me?

Marum
Guest
Marum

This is like the first time I read the ad for a – Solar Powered Torch.
My first thought was; Why would you want a torch for in daytime?
Then sanity prevailed.

Kiobada
Guest
Kiobada

Ok. You are an armed security guard You have a blind person, a pregnant woman, a psychopath, and a moron sitting on top of a high building. You have io get them into the back of your lockable security van, to get them all to hospital. 1. You can’t leave the blind man alone on top of the building because he may fall off. 2. You can’t leave the moron alone for he will wander off, and get lost. 3. You can’t leave the pregnant woman alone because she is due to give birth shortly 4. You cant leave the… Read more »

Kiobada
Guest
Kiobada

Also I forgot. You can’t leave the moron alone with the pregnant woman because he would be no help if she started to give birth.

Kiobada
Guest
Kiobada

Oh also. You can only take a maximum of two people with you at any time

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

That’s why we are scared of the elevators

Chuck
Guest
Chuck

Great ! I finally get to wear my “I’m with Stupid” shirt again !

Marum
Guest
Marum

“THE” moron.
You mean to imply, that they only have one in the whole of Japan.

Marum
Guest
Marum

I tried jumping up and down in a lift to see what would happen. It triggered the safety switch, and the lift stopped. Being an engineer I thought it would probably be a mercury Switch, like the “TILT” switch on a Pinball Machine. However, not so. It did not reset itself.
So I had to ring emergency service.
The good part was, I then lay down on the floor, and had 3/4 of an hour’s sleep, on the bosses time.

Casey83
Guest
Casey83

I say let the morons go!

WildaBeast
Guest
WildaBeast

Sorry, Dexter, I can’t let you on the elevator by yourself.

Auntie
Guest
Auntie

China has too many rules, but the Commentors today had a field day!

Mr. Wrong
Guest
Mr. Wrong

Curb your moron.

EffEff
Guest
EffEff

I thought they were called politicians.

Teal Glue
Guest
Teal Glue

Elevators: Normal People
Morons: The Stairs

Don
Guest
Don

I do believe I will be taking the stairs.

sirpaulfan
Guest
sirpaulfan

But cripples ride for free!!

Lucano
Guest
Lucano

My psychopath is a very good pet

Dag Kristiansen
Guest
Dag Kristiansen

Sounds like a great sequel to the good, the bad, and the ugly!

Audinac
Guest
Audinac

I can just imagine travelling with all these in the elevator. Hey lady, move over! I can’t see! HELP! Oh my god I’m having contractions! Lets put a smile on that FACE!

kt
Guest
kt

Always accompany the psychopath and they won’t be so psychopathicky

thedonger
Guest

But if someone has to accompany Rob Ford that could very well push the occupancy weight past the limit.

Christine
Guest
Christine

But….but….but, I LIKE touching the operational parts!!

DragonZap
Guest
DragonZap

Please do not leave morons unattended. All unattended morons will be brought into custody.

RocketCat
Guest
RocketCat

Sir?… SIR!!! This is your last warning! Stop treading the shaft door!

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