Office edition

Office edition

posted on 23 Sep 2016 in Chinglish, Menus

desktop-seal-meat

Fresh clubbed…

Photo courtesy of Mindrew.
Menu from Taiwanese restaurant in Shanghai, China.

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (85 votes, average: 3.95 out of 5)
Loading...
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
45 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
5 years ago

I prefer desktop mouse meat

algernon
algernon
5 years ago

Comes with a big screen

DrLex
DrLex
5 years ago

I guess it’s better than desktop mouse meat.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
5 years ago

– Got any public coffin meat?

algernon
algernon
5 years ago

Complete with a Windows upgrade

DrLex
DrLex
5 years ago

So that’s why there is a Greenpeace activist chained to my keyboard…

DrLex
DrLex
5 years ago

Desktop Seals are a special division of Navy Seals. They are deployed when someone has been installing too many browser toolbars.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
5 years ago

Fight against desktops!

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
5 years ago

“Private Tea Meat! Drop and give me twenty!”

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
5 years ago

“Stop blubbering and eat your seal meat, or you won’t get any dessert.”

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

Clubbing seals isn’t exactly PC.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

Great with chips.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

Tastes like an old boot.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

Raspberry pi for dessert.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
5 years ago

– Waiter! There’s Vista on my desktop!

Big Fat Cat
Big Fat Cat
5 years ago

I gave it a rating of Windows 10 out of 10

Big Fat Cat
Big Fat Cat
5 years ago

The private tea meat is hacked.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
5 years ago

I can think of plenty of screen savers I’d rather use.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
5 years ago

The private tea meat leaves a lot to be desired.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
5 years ago

Waiter! My desktop seal meat has a virus!

iLock
iLock
5 years ago

Private Tea Meat, for when you want to do some teabagging with your meat privates at the restaurant.

Desktop Seal Meat, for when you want to order online, with a side dish
of risqué Skype call with waitress.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
5 years ago

Eat desktop seal meat today, download brownware tomorrow.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
5 years ago

I guess they catch the seals in the internets.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
5 years ago

– Mommy, my Miss Steak fell through the Windows!

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

@ Droll 5:04

I get mine from an ISP — Internet Seal Provider.
Comes in packets.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

What do you mean I can only use HP Sauce?

jjhitt
jjhitt
5 years ago

Tea Meat: it’s not for everyone.

jjhitt
jjhitt
5 years ago

Try the Dust Bunny with keyboard crumbs.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
5 years ago

Good evening, my name is Clint and I’ll be your server.

Classic Steve
5 years ago

We weren’t going to kill it, but it kept interfering with our computer work….

Marum
Marum
5 years ago

Waiter: How much do you want sir?

Diner: Arf Arf!

Marum
Marum
5 years ago

ORCA; I approve of this menu.

Pete
Pete
5 years ago

They used Google Translate to get Seal Meat!!!

Actually the first 2 characters indicate it’s Taiwanese style.
I had to look up the characters and do some web searching.

My translation: Taiwan-style braised pork belly.

I would feel terrible eating a baby seal, like I would if I ate whale.
(That said, I’m not much of an enviro-greenie.)

But like Emeril Lagasse says “PIG FAT RULES, BABY!”

Pete
Pete
5 years ago

There’s a seal on my monitor!
(And a penguin on the telly.)

Pete
Pete
5 years ago

I Am The Walrus.
Guess that means I can relax now.

Goo goo gajoob.

DrLex
DrLex
5 years ago

@Pete: the last two characters do mean ‘seal’ and ‘meat’. However, ‘seal’ here is not the animal, but the verb. From what I can find, the name comes from the fact that the cooking pot remains sealed from the start of the cooking, up until when it is opened on the dining table.

Marum
Marum
5 years ago

@Pete. A week ago.

If you look back at the Engrish on how to use a Japanese Squat Toilet, (bout a week ago) you will find a posting on mixed bathing at “Onsens” by @Paul.

Also I posted again about the Philippines’ thermal areas we used to visit. That took some research, and not a few phone calls, for it was fifty years ago. You may find it slightly amusing, to read of my way of disposing of our Amah. I always had this handy engineering brain, and could logically plan ahead – successfully too. 🙂

Marum
Marum
5 years ago

My wife is a mad cow. That worries me more than seal meat.

Marum
Marum
5 years ago

If it starts fossicking around in your pockets looking for fish.

THAT IS A WORRY.

Pete
Pete
5 years ago

@Dr. Lex 916:

Yes sir, it does mean “to seal” rather than “a seal (animal)”.
It took a bit of ‘net searching to find a recipe for the item using the characters.

I figured in advance that it was an idiomatic usage.

Once I found a recipe, I knew I had it. (and that it had piggy, not baby seal.)

Pete
Pete
5 years ago

@Marum 1003 and 1026:

Well, mate, you’ve managed to point out to me once again that the English speaking nations of North America and Oceania are separated by a common language.

I’d never heard the term “fossicking” before but I certainly won’t forget it now! My equivalent would be “pokin’ around in yer pocket”.

As for onsens, the only possible thought I can muster on a late Friday afternoon is: “Crikey I wish we had Onsens here in the States like they do in Japan!”

Or as Homer Simpson says: “Mmmmmmmm….Onnnnsennnnnn….”
One of my fave pastimes whenever I’m in Japan.

Rt
Rt
5 years ago

Ugh.
It’s so annoying how often they push their updates on me. Right after I’ve consumed desktop seal meat 8.1, I get a popup saying desktop seal meat 10 is available; would you like to consume and install? I’M FULL DAMNIT!!

Long Tom
Long Tom
5 years ago

Actually, baby harp seals are clubbed not for food, but for their pelts, because they are nice and white. Trouble is, I thought there was little demand for fur pelts nowadays.

Marum
Marum
5 years ago

@Long Tom. What do thy need belts for? To carry their Flipper-grenades?

Peter
Peter
5 years ago

Laptop whale meat, perhaps?

Home | Brog | Store | Massage Board | Advertise | Contact Us | Disclaimer

© 1999 - 2022 Engrish.com. All rights reserved.
45
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x