Makes you feel like crap

Makes you feel like crap

posted on 28 Dec 2016 in Chinglish, Menus

breakfast-bowel-salad

Photo courtesy of Kent Kwong.
Found at Beijing hotel.

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Chris
Guest
Chris

I’d like to buy a bowel.

Marum
Guest
Marum

Sliver service

Marum
Guest
Marum

Actually! Slithery service.

Marum
Guest
Marum

The main problem, is that you ave to bend over to pick it up.

So, if you feel a sharp prick, thegood news, is that you have not injured your back.

Pete
Guest
Pete

These are your bowels on chinese salad.
(Literally AND figuratively!)

Geo
Guest
Geo

Looks the same before and after.

Geo
Guest
Geo

Not recommended for people with Irritable Bowl Syndrome.

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

From ”Breakfast Scissorforks”

Pete
Guest
Pete

Bend over and kiss your bowels goodbye after eating raw salad in China.
Because your bowels will wind up looking like that photo afterward.

Pete
Guest
Pete

The funny thing is that the translation is nearly perfect.
The first 2 characters do mean “breakfast”.
The last 2 characters do mean “salad”.
The issue is the middle character.
Which I think is used for both sausage, and sausage is traditionally stuffed into…a casing made of animal intestines…e.g., bowels!

Tim Crow
Guest
Tim Crow

Served with warm buns.

algernon
Guest
algernon

What no carrots

Yu No Hoo
Guest
Yu No Hoo

Perfect for a vagitarian diet.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Lettuce hope you have the guts to eat it.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Please pass the toilet pepper.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Wait- what are you gonna do with those tongs? 😯

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

This is your breakfast on crack.

Long Tom
Guest
Long Tom

Is it actually sausage? And what is it served atop of, shredded cabbage?

If so, it’s a Bohemian restaurant on China.

UCity
Guest
UCity

From a restaurant located in the bowls of the hotel.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Maybe they are DUMPlings.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

@Long Tom | 6:36 pm: That’s what it looks like to me, too! But then, I’ve heard of fake chicken eggs and plastic rice from China, both of which were sold as food, so who knows?

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

I can guess which hole they get corn flakes from.

Filboid
Guest
Filboid

Snap, Crapple and Plop! Good morning!

Seventy2rd o clock
Guest
Seventy2rd o clock

– Waiter! There is fork spoon!

Marum
Guest
Marum

@Pete 1320.
Och aye laddie So those wee slanties ken the Haggis….Nooo?

PeeBee
Guest
PeeBee

Filboid, more like snap, crackle, and poop.

Pete
Guest
Pete

@Marum 622:

Och aye, they do.

zankhana
Guest
zankhana

They say a good breakfast will keep you going all day……….

Marum
Guest
Marum

For they who do not understand what Pete and I were going on about.

Haggis is basically porridge, and a few other unmentionable ingedients, stuffed into a sheep’s stomach – which is basically a mega serving of tripe.

In Oz many years ago, they tried to import one for hogmanay – for the piping in of the Haggis –
(To look upon yer honest sonsie face,
Yer chieftain of the pudden race) {Burns}
however the Dept of Health banned it….Rightly so.
The Caledonian Society went beserk. (Which is barely indistiungisable from a normal day in Glasgow)

Pete
Guest
Pete

@Marum 6:18,

Anthony Bourdain (Or was it Andrew Zimmern? Can’t freakin’ remember) did a very informative segment on Haggis during a Scotland visit episode.

Basically Haggis appears to be Oatmeal mixed with internal sheep organ bits, baked in a sheep’s stomach.

I think I’ll stick to eating my oatmeal with milk and honey, thankya very much. In some situations I have a healthy dose of culinary adventurism. In others…such as when it comes to Haggis…I react more like yer typical ‘Murican.

Peter
Guest
Peter

Bowels of course . . . from the most bowelful country in the world.

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