It actually conditions as you chew!

It actually conditions as you chew!

posted on 17 Feb 2017 in Chinglish, Menus

shampoo-ribs

Massage ribs in mouth. Let sit for 2 minutes. Swallow and repeat.

Photo courtesy of Marcus Hastings.
Menu found in Guangzhou, China.

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (97 votes, average: 4.12 out of 5)
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algernon
algernon
3 years ago

Leaves your hair full of body

algernon
algernon
3 years ago

Brings back colour and movement

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
3 years ago

Waiter, there’s a hair in my shampoo.

Marum
Marum
3 years ago

What kind of aminal has spare

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
3 years ago

They’ll put hair on your chest!

Marum
Marum
3 years ago

What kind of aminal has “spare” ribs.

I need all of mine.

Marum
Marum
3 years ago

I heard of a Rabbit who washed his thing.

He couldn’t do a hair with it.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
3 years ago

Would you rather have real poo ribs?

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
3 years ago

I prefer soap rack of lamb.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
3 years ago

For shiny, bouncy ribs.

Big Fat Cat
Big Fat Cat
3 years ago

We have carbon footprint, now carbon spareribs is trendy.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
3 years ago

– Look Ma, no paper!

SF
SF
3 years ago

They probably meant sp’hair ribs.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
3 years ago

Instructions:

Number One – urinate the balls
Number Two – use shampoo

Marum
Marum
3 years ago

No, NO, No CHANG!

Repeat after me: Tickle ribs, shampoo balls.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
3 years ago

– Would you like Hairy Potter with that?

Long Tom
Long Tom
3 years ago

The alternative to sticking a bar of soap into a child’s mouth as a punishment.

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
3 years ago

“Gee Your Ribs Smell Terrific”

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
3 years ago

“Ribs so good, make you wanna slap your hairdresser!”

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
3 years ago

¥45 is too much toupée.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
3 years ago

Served with scalped potatoes.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
3 years ago

– Waiter? My ribs are hairy!
– This is nothing, Madam. You should see some other guests …

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
3 years ago

Personally served by the head waiter.

J-Luke
J-Luke
3 years ago

Carbon Barbecued Spareribs; sounds like they hired my neighbor…

PeeBee
PeeBee
3 years ago

It will help you clean your plate.

Vulcan64
Vulcan64
3 years ago

Better than sulfur barbecue.

EffEff
EffEff
3 years ago

So that’s what happened to Shampoo the killer whale.

Classic Steve
3 years ago

I’d lather not.

UCity
UCity
3 years ago

Takes away some of the oiliness.

Seventy2rd o clock
Seventy2rd o clock
3 years ago

– And L’Oral for my wife, please.

Geo
Geo
3 years ago

Look at these ribs.
Now back to me.
Now back at these ribs.
Now back to me.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
3 years ago

Trump’s real plan for wetbacks?

Myself
Myself
3 years ago

Someday you will die somehow and something’s gonna steal your carbon.

Myself
Myself
3 years ago

@Marum 4:28
Some people have a 13th rib, so that’s definitely a spare.

iLock
iLock
3 years ago

“It’s quite a mess we’ve got here detective…
He tried to off himself with carbon monoxide, failing that he attempted to hong himself, after the knot came loose he went to the backyard and barbecued himself, all that’s left are a few spareribs..”

“I just can’t deal with this mess. Jack, get the shampoo…”

iLock
iLock
3 years ago

•Try the charcoal Shwarzcough ribs – true to their name!
•The spicy ribs will have you Pantene for a drink…
Our 11 Herbal Essences and spices will not disappoint

*Ribs are also available rare, if you like them soft and manageable.

If you have any enquiries about about our sausage products – Please call Johnson and Johnson. Both of those guys’ numbers can be found on the next page I think… Although I’m not 100% sure as the other menu / shampoo instruction pages are being done by someone else, so I can’t fully verify that for you..

iLock
iLock
3 years ago

Directions:

Step 1: Apply serving to mouth
Step 2: Chew
Step 3: Enjoy
Step 4: Swallow
Step 5: Rinse
Step 6: Repeat for seconds if desired
Step 7: Please come again
Step 8: Repeat steps 1 to 7 to leave your stomach feeling
revitalized and smelling gorgeous.

*The phone number for Johnson & Johnson can be
found on the previous page.

Marum
Marum
3 years ago

If yiu shampoo balls, the skinny bloke spits at you.

iLock
iLock
3 years ago

Uhhh.. I think I’m too full for my conditioned ice cream sundae dessert.

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