Finally… toilet paper.

Finally… toilet paper.

posted on 18 Jun 2018 in Chinglish, Signs

nice-toilet

Sorry I have to defile it…
Photo courtesy of Claire Fossey.
Found in China. 

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Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
2 years ago

In loo of naughty toilet.

Algernon
Algernon
2 years ago

A place for some fresh air urination.

Yu No Hoo
Yu No Hoo
2 years ago

It’s the best rank you’ll find in a toilet.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

It’s on the Mag-lev Train. Imagine being able to crap at 400KPH.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

Department of Irrigation frowns on you peeing at more than 200mph.

Algernon
Algernon
2 years ago

It’s full of nice people

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

An ice toilet will freeze your nutzoff.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

A bloke got caught in one of these latest French self-cleaning toilets. Maybe there were warning signs, but he could read no French.

Apparently water started spurting out of everywhere. He ended up like a drowned rat, apparently.

Has anyone else encountered such a device?

Running Comment
Running Comment
2 years ago

The ‘Bureau of City Engineering and Gardening’ is next to the ‘Office of Surgery and Choir Singing’.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

In China? That toilet travelled a long way from Nice!

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

@Running Comment 0437. The old operas with the women’s arias written for Castrati are seldom performed nowadays.

It appears that the young men of today, are not “cut out” for the job.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

@Marum | 4:36 am: Those toilets are gradually showing up around Adelaide and suburbs. The French one had to be faulty. If they’re occupied, the door is supposed to open as a clue to vacate, well before the self-cleaning starts.
I waited at least 15 minutes for one of these to finish its cleaning process before I gave up and went elsewhere. No idea how long it’s supposed to take.
BTW, these toilets talk in an American accent; Septic Tank? 😛

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

The Muzak plays WC Handy.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

Would an ice toilet be an ig loo?

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

@DNT 0448. Take no notice. The I-ties are just bragging that they can still hit it.

Frank Burns
Frank Burns
2 years ago

Well, it is a far cry from the one in “Trainspotting”.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

@Marum | 4:11 am: You don’t want to be there when THAT hits the fan!!

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

The Bureau of City Engineering and Gardening grows a lot of pees.

Algernon
Algernon
2 years ago

We have a nice toilet near us. It talks with American accent and sings “What the world needs now is love sweet love”.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

@DNT Speaking of peeing at 200mph. I just had a transurethral prostatectomy a bit over a week ago. – Joys of getting old. The only compensation was, that very pretty young nurses kept coming in for a couple of days inspecting it. At least when one of them pulled the Catheter out, (bout as thick as a pencil) it didn’t hurt as much, I guess.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

They could afford a nice toilet because they were flush with funds.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

Actually that is a psychological fact from some research I have read.Apparently with men, if painful procedures are performed by pretty young women, the men report less pain.

We men, certainly are strange creatures, aren’t we?

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

@Marum | 5:11 am: Ouch! Reminds me, the Doc wants me to get a PSA test soon. No problem with the waterworks yet, just checking up.
BTW, ever had the old “finger” test. I had one once; not painful, just slightly weird. I was like, “Oh, so THAT”S where it is!”

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

@Algernon: What country do you live in? I’ve been assuming from some of your comments it’s not the US.

Pete
Pete
2 years ago

Goooood tou

seventy2rd o clock
seventy2rd o clock
2 years ago

– Nice toi let you!

seventy2rd o clock
seventy2rd o clock
2 years ago

Just after cleaning, I assume.

Pete
Pete
2 years ago

Oops. Hit submit by accident.

Classic Steve
2 years ago

…Shame if something were to happen to it.

Long Tom
Long Tom
2 years ago

In South Korea, their toilets typically consist of one Western toilet and several squat toilets. Wonder how China is?

Pete
Pete
2 years ago

@Long Tom 7:36 am,

Ohhhhh, China is worse.
Much, MUCH worse, especially out of the big cities.

Public bathrooms are usually squatty potties and frankly, not only are they covered in pee (I literally had to pay attention to avoid slipping) some locals don’t even bother with the pot. They just dump on the floor!

At least, that’s what I experienced in Guangzhou in late 2008….

In Japan my rule, if I wanted a western toilet, was too look for a McDonalds, Starbucks, Denny’s or a Shakey’s.

Pete
Pete
2 years ago

@Myself 8:48,

Meaning, the pee was all over the floor of the public bathroom, not just the toilets themselves.

I once had a colleague originally from Taiwan who told me she was shocked at the Mainland Chinese’ lack of toilet etiquette. Not just the public bathrooms like I mentioned above. She once say a parent allow his son to take a dump right there on the station platform in a Beijing subway station! She said that in Taiwan that would NEVER happen.

Long Tom
Long Tom
2 years ago

Then the sign should also have said, “For foreign devil use only.”

algernon
algernon
2 years ago

@Droll not Troll 5:28 am. The hint was some time ago here https://www.engrish.com/2012/11/donner-party-of-6/
I’m Australian

DrLex
DrLex
2 years ago

This is actually an almost accurate translation. To be exact, the Chinese text reads “excellent public toilet”.

Droll not Troll
Droll not Troll
2 years ago

@algernon | 1:01 am: Ah! So long ago, I don’t even remember that post. Been wondering whatever became of Pectolatra.
(My other 2 guesses were that you could be a Pom or a Kiwi.)
I’m impressed at the percentage of Aussie captioners on here!
Oh, and keep up the good work insulting that orange POS.

Pete
Pete
2 years ago

Goooooood toilet………..Goooood Toilet………Niiiice toilet………down toilet……..DOWN TOILET…..DOWN…..

NO TOILET………NOOOOOO…..AUUUUGGGGHHH!!!!!

(Suck….Pop….Flusssshh…..Gulp…..Ahhhh…)

And Superintendent Pei Wen was never heard from again.

-Excerpted from “Attack of the Killer Toilets”.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

@DNT 0405. Not surprisingly really. The peole in WA. FNQ. and Nhulunbuy, have always holidayed in SE. Asia. We’ve always been this white enclave in SE Asia, insular as all F—. Even nowadays, the average Aussie sees little value in learning another language. Most of my mates think I’m a little mad in that regard. I used to explain it as follows. When I flew a lot, for work I could read Conan The Barbarian. or a book, on engineering, or study a language. That way, when I arrived, I was a little bit better informed. Not necessarily wiser, for… Read more »

Big Fat Cat
Big Fat Cat
2 years ago

and the Oscar award for Best Toilet goes to ……

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

SO! It appears that the Chinesee are pathologically unable to aim “Percy at the pocelain”.

However that must be able to hit other targets with much greater reliability. One does not achieve a population of nigh on 1.5 billion, if you don’t ring the bell fairly regularly.

Marum
Marum
2 years ago

EDIT that = they.

Peter Chan
Peter Chan
2 years ago
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