I can’t tell if I turned off the lights.

I can’t tell if I turned off the lights.

posted on 5 Jun 2019 in Chinglish, Household Items, Toys

This is the last time I hire a poet for product description.

Photo courtesy of Whiteley Foster.

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Droll not TrollDrLexWax FrogBig Fat CatMarum Recent comment authors
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Algernon
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Algernon

I want the light off

Algernon
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Algernon

The day the day the light of day

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

I don’t remember if I forget, either. It’s a real turn off.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Night lights are not supposed to shine in the day. It’s a union thing.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

“I woke up at midnight, still see clearly”. Now, is that a blues/gospel lyric, or what?

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

“Night light mushroom shape” – Put it away, Donald.

Frank Burns
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Frank Burns

But will it keep the monsters away?

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Product features? With that text, I think they mean “Praise Jesus!” “(I have seen the light!)”

iLock
Guest
iLock

My sleep, I wrote this in my sleep.
In dream, turned the made sense switch on in dream, made the senses in the dream dreams dream

Running Comment
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Running Comment

Aha ! The night of the living daylights !

Running Comment
Guest
Running Comment

The bells, the bells…!

Chris
Guest
Chris

He’s a poet, and-um, not aware of the fact.

Marum
Guest
Marum

The little fairy got pregnant because she sat on the night light. Because it was not a mushroom, but a toad’stool.

Marum
Guest
Marum

And the Lord said. LET THERE BE LIGHT.”

And lo. He could see for f—en miles.

Marum
Guest
Marum

If my bum looks big on the mushroom, how does my Vay-jay looks on the toadstool.

Marum
Guest
Marum

AWAKE! The Jiao Bai light has driven the stars from the field of night,
An lights the hotel room with a beam of light.

Now try to sleep, you bastard!

Marum
Guest
Marum

Chineeesee blank verse, turn round-eye brain to water.

And the round-eye to hard liquor.

Marum
Guest
Marum

Sir Lancelot put headlights and tail lights on his trusty steed.

One could say, they were———Knight-lights.BOOM BOOM

Peter Chan
Guest
Peter Chan

The night, the night light lights right up, revealing with no slight delight the plight of the tree with blight – the tree where the bird alights . . .

Marum
Guest
Marum

Stuff your bloody night light. I have a young Chinese lady who is too shy with the light on. We have not been able to make; “The beast With Two Backs”, for over a week now.

To be plain: “I don’t want to see at midnight. I’d prefer to be having orgasms at the stroke of twelve.”

TURN YOUR FLIGGIN NIGHT LIGHT OFF!

Big Fat Cat
Guest
Big Fat Cat

As JiaoBai light shines in your mouth

Wax Frog
Guest
Wax Frog

I sooooo want to hear Justin Hayward read this aloud!

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

@BFC: Midnight? I think it might be tooth hurty!

DrLex
Guest
DrLex

Looks like the result of an overdose of ’shrooms.

Droll not Troll
Guest
Droll not Troll

Nighty night, light light, don’t let the mushrooms bite.

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